diamond geezer

 Wednesday, February 07, 2018

Ombudsman's Report

It is with regret that I must inform all subscribers that the Diamond Geezer Quality Threshold has been breached.

This has been triggered by twelve consecutive days of posts containing at least one error pointed out by a member of the general readership.

Strict remedial measures will be introduced, commencing with the publication of this report. Compensation will be paid in full.

Day 1: Friday 26th January 2018 (Random station project)
Susan emailed to point out a repeated word in the final paragraph ("for every every London station"). The error was corrected within 78 minutes.

Day 2: Saturday 27th January 2018 (Random station - Fairlop)
Roger kicked off by pointing out that the last sentence ("the station really isn't very away") needed a 'far' added. A 'far' was added.
Joho queried the adverbial phrase "echoingly similarly", leading to one of the suffixes being deleted.
Rob noted an incorrect spelling of the local neighbourhood, asserting "I think you’ll find it's Fullwell in these parts. Fulwell is near Twickenham." Four occurrences in the text, along with one photo label and three Flickr tags, were surreptitiously updated.

Day 3: Sunday 28th January 2018 (Random bus route - 293)
Description of the bus journey suggested that the headgear being worn by a toddler in a buggy was "a woolly hat with endearing dinosaur ears." Milo was swift to query the anatomical veracity of these knitted protrusions. "At the risk of appearing a tad pedantic could you remind us all which dinosaur it was that sported ears? (external ears that is. I assume they had internal ones much like the reptiles/ birds of today)". The general consensus was that the author's anthropomorphic interpretation had been flawed. No rectification has been made.
Despite the word 'Perrinesque' not actually existing, it was misspelt, as Waterhouse promptly noted.

Day 4: Monday 29th January 2018 (Apsley House/Wellington Arch)
Injudicious use of the cut and paste function led to the ridiculous claim that the admission price at the Wellington Arch was £5.00 (£11.20 inc. Wellington Arch). This slipshod error was pointed out by four different people, including DG's father, and was not corrected for over an hour because the author was still asleep. More care must be taken when setting posts to auto-publish.
SJM did some proper research relating to the quadriga atop the Wellington Arch. "I don't think it's Nike that's at the reigns, but a boy." Technically they're reins, but SJM was otherwise correct.

Day 5: Tuesday 30th January 2018 (Hold the handrail)
It took less than an hour for Martin to query the assertion that the only escalators at Circle & Hammersmith and City line group stations are at Moorgate and Liverpool Street. "There are also short escalators at Paddington on the H&C," he said. Whilst these lead to the Bakerloo line, Martin was technically correct, invalidating several of the subsequent qualitative arguments.

Day 6: Wednesday 31st January 2018 (Super blue blood moon)
Andrew chipped in with several points. The post had suggested that a lunar eclipse appears red following lunar reflection, but Andrew knew the effect was due to earlier atmospheric refraction, specifically Rayleigh scattering. He also knew that the albedo of the surface of the moon is low, specifically 0.12, so most of the light is not reflected back. He also queried how New Zealand could ever get a blue moon in February, given that the month has no more than 29 days, but this was never claimed in the post so did not count as a third black mark.
GJ had a more serious query regarding the assertion that the UK had seen a super blue blood moon in December 1982. He provided evidence from NASA that the lunar eclipse had been invisible from London, invalidating the 'blood' aspect, although the claim would of course have been true in Iceland.

Day 7: Thursday 1st February 2018 (The Count)
Count number 4 has again been listed as "Number of hours each day I sleep", on this occasion attached to a numerical value of 188. Last year reader B queried how DG could possibly have slept for nearly 200 hours a day, and reader shirokazan said "I suspect he meant to write 'Number of hours slept', omitting the 'each day' bit". This was wise advice, but remained unheeded, hence this year it was reader Sarah's turn to chip in with an incredulous "You sleep 188 hours each day?" Greater attention must be paid to previous complaints, and these must be duly acted upon.

Day 8: Friday 2nd February 2018 (Headstone Manor)
Millionaire's shortbread proved predictably controversial regarding the placement of its apostrophe. In an email Neil suggested that the correct positioning was after the final 's', as confirmed by the BBC Good Food website, but other sources omit the 's' completely. Mary Berry is silent on the matter, and Jamie Oliver avoids grammatical conflict by calling them caramel squares.

Day 9: Saturday 3rd February 2018 (Hat quiz/Bus cuts)
There were no issues with the hat quiz. If only this had been the sole post of the day, the Quality Threshold would not have been breached. Alas the additional list of bus cuts included a cut and paste error, noted by sharp-eyed reader Greg. Route 230 had of course not received a frequency cut two months running, and the second occurrence should have been a 228.

Day 10: Sunday 4th February 2018 (Dull London)
Andrew (not that Andrew, another Andrew) recognised that lorries generally drive across the centre of mini-roundabouts, and this manoeuvre was therefore unworthy of inclusion in the post. "Isn't part of the point of mini-roundabouts that you give way following the same rules as a full-size one but don't religiously have to go round it?" Technically section 188 of the Highway Code states that "All vehicles MUST pass round the central markings except large vehicles which are physically incapable of doing so", so the point is moot, but this nuance should have been more clearly signalled.

Day 11: Monday 5th February 2018 (Crowded tube carriages)
It was remiss of the author to make sweeping statements about the passenger density within Hammersmith & City line carriages arriving at Bow Road station during the morning rush hour. Regular user Moogal knows from experience that "there's fewer of them, so in the peaks they're often fuller than the District services." In future empirical evidence must be used to back up sweeping assertions.

Day 12: Tuesday 6th February 2018 (Monday morning in E3)
An anonymous commenter immediately spotted a problem with the last bit (in italics) - "Alternatively money can be can donated here..." The extra "can" was deleted before the majority of readers ever saw it.
An occasional reader observed that "There's a redundant 'could have could have' in the middle of paragraph 8." Officially only one of the 'could have's was redundant, but this embarrassing error was swiftly edited.
Andrew (yes, that Andrew again, not the other Andrew) spotted a careless error in the description of park flora. "Were the crocuses open (unfurled) or closed (furled)?" Andrew knew very well that they were closed, and that only someone with a poor grasp of the English language would have written "unfurled", but he still couched his pedantry as a question so as not to appear too big-headed.
Martin apologised for pointing out a infuriating grammatical construction. "Two ladies are sitting, please. Sat is a simple past. You are writing, for vivid effect, in the historic present. They sit. They are sitting. Never they are sat. And for past tenses: They were sitting or they sat. Never 'they were sat'. And certainly not sat sitting or stood standing." This was a particularly egregious blunder, given that other readers have noted similar mistakes in the past. In October 2017 Richard said "Has anyone else noticed that DG has an aversion to the word sitting, eg 'the lady sat beside me was fully settled'." Even as far back as April 2008 Felix said "Can one be sat on a train? I know it is common parlance, but whatever happened to the present participle 'sitting'? It's a bit like saying 'I am ate/eaten my dinner in Coventry'." No matter how poor the grammatical pedagogy of the author's 1970s education, readers must be taken seriously when they repeatedly proffer constructive linguistic advice. This must be the final appearance of the sat/sitting debacle, else further censorial steps will be taken.

Twelve consecutive days of invalid posts is an act of wanton editorial negligence, and the Ombudsman apologises to readers for any offence taken. Refunds will be available through the usual channels.

Rest assured that a probationary period has now been entered into, and the blog's author has been duly chastised for his inadequacies. Please be alert to any further shortcomings, however small.


It is only through the relentless nitpicking of the collective readership that appropriately high standards of 100% perfection can be maintained.

<< click for Newer posts

click for Older Posts >>

click to return to the main page

...or read more in my monthly archives
Jan19  Feb19  Mar19  Apr19
Jan18  Feb18  Mar18  Apr18  May18  Jun18  Jul18  Aug18  Sep18  Oct18  Nov18  Dec18
Jan17  Feb17  Mar17  Apr17  May17  Jun17  Jul17  Aug17  Sep17  Oct17  Nov17  Dec17
Jan16  Feb16  Mar16  Apr16  May16  Jun16  Jul16  Aug16  Sep16  Oct16  Nov16  Dec16
Jan15  Feb15  Mar15  Apr15  May15  Jun15  Jul15  Aug15  Sep15  Oct15  Nov15  Dec15
Jan14  Feb14  Mar14  Apr14  May14  Jun14  Jul14  Aug14  Sep14  Oct14  Nov14  Dec14
Jan13  Feb13  Mar13  Apr13  May13  Jun13  Jul13  Aug13  Sep13  Oct13  Nov13  Dec13
Jan12  Feb12  Mar12  Apr12  May12  Jun12  Jul12  Aug12  Sep12  Oct12  Nov12  Dec12
Jan11  Feb11  Mar11  Apr11  May11  Jun11  Jul11  Aug11  Sep11  Oct11  Nov11  Dec11
Jan10  Feb10  Mar10  Apr10  May10  Jun10  Jul10  Aug10  Sep10  Oct10  Nov10  Dec10 
Jan09  Feb09  Mar09  Apr09  May09  Jun09  Jul09  Aug09  Sep09  Oct09  Nov09  Dec09
Jan08  Feb08  Mar08  Apr08  May08  Jun08  Jul08  Aug08  Sep08  Oct08  Nov08  Dec08
Jan07  Feb07  Mar07  Apr07  May07  Jun07  Jul07  Aug07  Sep07  Oct07  Nov07  Dec07
Jan06  Feb06  Mar06  Apr06  May06  Jun06  Jul06  Aug06  Sep06  Oct06  Nov06  Dec06
Jan05  Feb05  Mar05  Apr05  May05  Jun05  Jul05  Aug05  Sep05  Oct05  Nov05  Dec05
Jan04  Feb04  Mar04  Apr04  May04  Jun04  Jul04  Aug04  Sep04  Oct04  Nov04  Dec04
Jan03  Feb03  Mar03  Apr03  May03  Jun03  Jul03  Aug03  Sep03  Oct03  Nov03  Dec03
 Jan02  Feb02  Mar02  Apr02  May02  Jun02  Jul02 Aug02  Sep02  Oct02  Nov02  Dec02 

eXTReMe Tracker
jack of diamonds
Life viewed from London E3

» email me
» follow me on twitter
» follow the blog on Twitter
» follow the blog on RSS

my flickr photostream