diamond geezer

 Tuesday, October 21, 2003

Sixty things that are simply unpleasant: A plate of vegetables, waiting for the dawn, dusk, too many birthdays, a child's evil grin, someone else playing their favourite album for the 457th time, playing a disappointing album for the first time, birdshit, mayonnaise, a cold shower, unexplained aches, standing in a tiny space on a crowded train, low grey clouds, sleet, saying goodbye to a friend you won't see again for ages, thick fog, someone else's unwashed sheets, knowing that you'll never spot Concorde in the sky again, the first day in the Autumn when you need to wear a coat, disrespect, bad manners, finding £20 in a pocket after you empty the washing machine, staring at rain through a window, getting stuck on the first clue in the crossword, tears, an unwanted cup of coffee, watching a plant die, being overtaken by a caravan, tofu, having to pay to sit in the park on a deckchair, power cuts, Christmas in October, not getting a reply to a text message, frostiness, Manchester United winning, frothy sewage lapping on a beach, broken friendship, losing your hair, spotting items in half price sales that you bought at full price, 9pm Sunday evening, 9am Monday morning, empty Sundays, arriving on the platform just as your train departs, an inbox full of viagra, having nothing to do, living in the countryside, being lost in a big city, waiting for a nightbus, reading the last page of a book first, the smell of egg sandwiches, The Sound Of Music, drilling, waiting in an airport terminal, waiting in a foreign airport terminal, catching a sniffly cold from a stranger, being ignored by a stranger you'd really like to flirt with, being called sunshine, moonlighting, Rich Tea biscuits, discovering there isn't an afterlife.

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