diamond geezer

 Thursday, December 11, 2003

What's on BBC1 this Christmas Day?
pre-10am Shows for working class kids who didn't have many presents to open.
10.00 The religious bit, live from Milton Keynes, which is somehow very zeitgeist.
11.00 That fun but over-repeated cartoon about Robbie (Williams) the Reindeer.
11.35 Morecambe and Wise, back from the Seventies when they were Christmas.
12.40pm Mr Disney wrongly thinks Tigger, Pooh and friends have American accents.
1.50 The News, except there isn't any, apart from a grim house fire in Scotland.
2.00 Let's see how Andi Peters buggers up the Christmas Day Top Of The Pops.
3.00 The Queen shows her holiday snaps and namechecks the Commonwealth.
3.10 Dale Winton takes over Noel's dreams-can-come-true sugarfest nightmare.
3.55 Anne Robinson fills a scheduling hole by presenting the Weakest Compilation.
4.25 Oh dear, it's Stuart Little, that squeaky clean mouse with a cheesy tale.
5.50 The News again, except there still isn't any, apart from a celebrity obituary.
6.00 Kat and Alfie's EastEnders wedding fails to go smoothly. There's a surprise.
6.40 Festive edition of the sitcom My Family... or just look beside you on the sofa.
7.10 A variety special, if you think Will Young is variety and Posh Spice is special.
8.30 The News, except there still isn't any, apart from an update on Kat and Alfie.
8.40 More EastEnders, or turn over to ITV for the nightmare global-sized Pop Idol.
9.20 The last ever Only Fools And Horses. No, honest, they really mean it this time.
10.35 From Peckham to Beckham, or at least Ronni Ancona's Big Impression of her.
11.20 The Thomas Crown Affair, but sadly the 1999 remake of the 1968 classic.
1.05am The other religious bit, squeezed to 5 minutes, hidden in the early hours.
1.10 Airplane, but it's only the sequel, so Shirley it's not worth staying up for.
2.35 News 24, struggling to make no news fill an entire channel. Merry Boxing Day.

posted 07:00 :

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