2) To reduce my spam intake.
Verdict: The plague of email spam has been halted, thanks to my ISP who installed spam-blocking software at the end of January. I do miss getting emails, though. Alas it seems the spammers have turned their drone-like attention to my comments box instead, but at least Haloscan seem to have them under control.
3) To keep my place tidy.
Verdict: Not bad. OK, so there are Christmas cards littering the carpet and there's a string of fairy lights down the hallway, but I believe they're temporary. Other than that, if you're one of the six visitors to my house this year I do hope you'll agree the place looked reasonably presentable.
4) To go up to anyone I see wearing more than one item of Burberry clothing and call them a tosser.
Verdict: There aren't many Burberry tossers any more, are there? The hardcore scallies have moved on (Von Dutch, anyone?), and now you're more likely to see beige plaid on a granny's handbag than a chav's cap. A year is a long time in fashion.
5) To go back to the cinema again.
Verdict: After 12 months away from the big screen, I finally made it back in May. And June and July and August and September and October and November. But not December, so maybe Hollywood hasn't completely won me back yet.
6) To shed pounds.
Verdict: That's money not weight, you'll remember, given that I am one of the world's worst shoppers. Unfortunately I remain so, and I've probably got worse this year rather than better. I barely wasted any money in 2004 on the acquisition of material goods, which has been great news for my bank balance if nothing else. Maybe I'll spot some must-have item in the January sales later today, but somehow I doubt it. 1pm update: Just walked the length of Oxford Street - spent 93p
7) To search out new and exciting webpages and stuff for all my readers.
Verdict: Like this and this and this and this, for example. Sorted.
8) To drink at least one of the three bottles of complimentary champagne sitting in my kitchen.
Verdict: No such luck. I had the means, I just needed motive and opportunity. Here's hoping 2005 has a bit more fizz.
Just the one resolution for 2005, I think...