Thursday, May 31, 2007
100 years of increasingly anti-social music
The piano
Perfect for playing... jolly songs to fill the dark days before the invention of recorded music
Loudspeakers? No, but Mama couldn't half belt out a good folk song round the parlour fireplace
Did kids play them on buses? No, they'd never have been able to lug one aboard a horse-drawn omnibus
The phonograph/gramophone/record player
Perfect for playing... your favourite 3 minute vinyl disc over and over and over again
Loudspeakers? Oh yes - a great big horn for the repeated blaring of that aforementioned tune
Did kids play them on buses? No chance - the needle would jump
The wireless/radio
Perfect for playing... somebody else's choice of good music
Loudspeakers? Integral to the design
Did kids play them on buses? No, even a transistor radio was too far big to fit in a pocket
The hi-fi
Perfect for playing... that stack of vinyl and CDs clogging up six shelves in your living room
Loudspeakers? Wooh, yeah, I can turn Pink Floyd right up to 10 and make the neighbours vibrate
Did kids play them on buses? No, never - there are no power points on buses
The ghetto blaster
Perfect for... hiphop C90 mixtapes you spent ages compiling in your bedroom
Loudspeakers? Oh yes, it's a mighty pounding beatbox!
Did kids play them on buses? No, far too cumbersome (better suited to blaring in the park)
The Walkman
Perfect for playing... that Dire Straits album you bought on cassette from Our Price
Loudspeakers? No, just a couple of tinny headphones
Did kids play them on buses? If they did, we never heard them (that's the joy of a "personal stereo")
The iPod
Perfect for playing... some low quality mp3 file you downloaded for 79p
Loudspeakers? No, just some very obvious, very nickable, slightly nerdy white headphones
Did kids play them on buses? No, much too expensive for your average spotty teenager
The mobile phone
Perfect for playing... some mindless rap gibberish or a bloody annoying R&B ringtone
Loudspeakers? Yes - alas this is the default option (no headphones here)
Do kids play them out loud on buses? Yes, because, for the first time, they can. Damn.
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