Marathons are for wusses. For a true test of all-round fitness and stamina there's only one true test, and that's triathlon. First a swim (of up to 1500m), then a cycle (of up to 40km) and finally - assuming you're not completely knackered already - a run (of up to 10km). That's a very long way, especially on the hottest weekend of the year, which made competing in the London Triathlon a real test of character. More than ten thousand competitors took part, split into 37 different waves across two days, with many raising considerable sums of money for good causes. I went down to the ExCel Centre in Docklands to view the spectacle [photo], and I couldn't fail to be impressed.
Step 1: Swim
With the temperature nudging thirty degrees, what better start than a refreshing dip in the Royal Victoria Dock? Competitors zipped up their wetsuits, slipped into the water and swam out to the starting position beneath the Britannia footbridge. I watched from above as "Male Olympic 40-54 Group 1" trod water behind a row of buoys and canoes, waiting for the race to begin [photo]. A jovial pink-haired fellow roused the waiting paddlers with the odd "oggy oggy oggy" through his megaphone, before the siren sounded and a seething shoal of swimmers set off determinedly through the water [photo]. Only 30 miles to go. A plane heading for City Airport flew screamingly low directly overhead. The swimmers splashed on, turning back at an orange buoy just before they reached the runway. On arrival back at the dockside they were helped from the water and ran up a ramp through jets of showered spray [photo], before being urged to remove their wetsuits and drop them in a plastic bag. The event was organised with military precision.
Step 1½: transition
There's an added difficulty in multi-discipline sport, and it's switching from one mode of transport to another. You can't take your bike for a swim, so you have to find it inside a giant bikeshed before you can continue the course. A huge cavernous expanse of the ExCel Centre had been given over to this function, with about quarter of a mile of bikeracks laid out in long rows to create the world's largest changing room. Dripping wet competitors jogged in, located their bike somewhere down one of the dark aisles and switched into cycling mode. It's no good just being a mega-athlete in this sport - you have to be a speedy quick change artist too.
Step 2: cycle
It's a two-wheeled London summer. Everywhere you look, it seems, there are lycra-clad thighs vigorously pumping atop a streamlined saddle. Yesterday, at ExCel, there were several thousand. It was no good attempting to drive between Docklands and the City yesterday afternoon, because the roads had been given over to manic pedalling. North of Canary Wharf the cyclists enjoyed three lanes to themselves, while four-wheeled traffic was corralled into a single bumper-to-bumper crawl lane alongside. Some of the cyclists were heading for Tower Bridge, twice, while others sped as far as Westminster. It looked to be a most glorious route in the cloudless summer sunshine, but for the participants there was no time to stop and admire along the way.
Step 3: run
After a second transition stage (dump bike, remove helmet, put trainers on) it was time for the final run. I can't even manage half a mile these days, but these elite Olympic-level participants still had six and a bit to go. Luckily, by ambling over the elevated footbridge across the docks, I could reach the turn-round point in Britannia Village before they could. Here a giant orange bottle proclaimed the name of the event's sponsored energy drink, and sweltering athletes grabbed a cup (to ensure "hydration") before dashing back around the water's edge (past not terribly many spectators) to the race's finish. Unusually the finishing line was indoors, inside the ExCel Centre itself, next to a small exhibition of triathlon-related stalls. Here you could buy figure-hugging wetsuits and heart-rate monitors and nutrition supplements, amongst other specialist fare. The Territorial Army were recruiting, presumably because ultra-fit athletes require less training than their usual lager-drinkers and kebab-munchers. I walked away with a goody bag containing a free baseball cap, a bag of nuts and a bottle of the sponsor's beer - an alcoholic beverage that no true triathlete would dream of drinking on a race day. And I walked away with enormous respect for anyone sufficiently fit and motivated to take on such an enormous physical challenge, all for a cheap metal medal and the satisfaction of having completed the course.
Step 1: Swim
Step 2: cycle
Step 3: run
