Omigod omigod omigod! It's here! The gadgetiest gadget in the history of gadgets is released in the UK today! The iPHONE is here! Yip yip hooray!
I've been SO looking forward to today, ever since Steve the AppleMan announced the iPhone's iBirth back in January. It's been SO hard waiting SO long for today to arrive that I nearly got on the plane to America and bought one there. Oh how I've longed just to stroke its interactive touchscreen and feel those sleek metal curves against my skin. Oh to have an iBulge in my pocket, vibrating its cybergoodness every time somebody sends me a text. And so soon now, SO SOON!
Have you seen how COOL the iPhone display is? Big chunky icons in proper nice technicolour, mmmm yummy. And menus that swishy-woo across the screen at the touch of a finger, wheeee! You can add ALL your music until the 8gig memory gets full, and there's a headphone socket which only takes iPod headphones but that's fine because iPod headphones are BRILL and don't leak. You can upload tons of photos to bore people with on the bus, and there's a really great camera which has TWO megapixels which is like cutting edge these days. It's all so intuitive, so flash and so gimme gimme gimme! And SO easy to get hold of. All you need is an up-to-date computer and proper broadband and a fully-functional iTunes account and an 18 month mobile phone contract and a lot of money. I mean, what could be simpler?
Me, I'm DEFFO going to be joining the queue outside the Apple store in Regent Street this afternoon, because I need an iPhone SO much. The big launch is at 6:02 tonight. 6:02, that's clever that is, because O2's the only phone network on which you can use the iPhone. I'm not on O2 myself, well not yet, but obviously I will be by half past eight this evening. I'm tied in with the opposition at the moment, but that's OK because I don't mind having two phone contracts with two different companies simultaneously. I can be rid of the old one by Christmas next year, and then I'll just have my LUVVERLY iPhone to pay for. It's only £269 up front and then thirty-five quid a month for at least 18 months. And that's only £899 altogether, that is. Utter bargain, just to have swishy-woo screen menus.
And my iPhone will work really fantastic so long as it has wi-fi. Which is great cos I've got wi-fi at home. I can sit on my sofa with my iPhone and surf the internet on my ickle squinty iScreen for as long as I like. Hurrah! I doubt I'll be using my laptop again, EVER, not now I've got miniature perfection. And it'll be dead easy using wi-fi when I'm out too, just so long as I'm at the British Library or staying at a Holiday Inn or in a Little Chef or some other really conveniently located hotspot. For everywhere else O2 has this excellent special 2.5G network called EDGE which is nearly everywhere. Well they promise it WILL be - it's only across 30% of the country so far, but who wants to live in the dull 70% part anyway? Sorry Mum, sorry Dad, but I can't demonstrate how ace and interactive the iPhone is while I'm up in Norfolk. Serves you right for living where there are fields. But, like, your loss.
The whole iThing is like TOO EXCITING. It's all about interactive gleamy technology. It's all about poking stuff with your magic finger. It's all about knowing what the temperature is in Los Angeles. It's all about being able to download the new Macy Gray album no matter where you are in the UK (near enough). It's all about watching YouTube videos of Japanese gameshows while you're on the train. It's Mega-iPod PLUS. It's the iFuture. It's iIconic. Oh, and it makes phone calls too.
