During February 2003 on diamond geezer I kept myself busy by counting things. Ten different counts, to be precise, in a none-too thrilling daily feature called 'The Count'. My 28-day tally chart may have been deathly dull to the rest of you, but I've continued to count those ten categories again, everyFebruarysince, just to keep tabs on how my life is changing. Below are my counts for February 2008, accompanied by the previous statistics and some deep, meaningful pondering. Should you care, that is. note: in leap years, only the first 28 days count
Count 1 (Blog visitors): Another year, another abnormal February. More than 10% of this month's visitors have stumbled in unintentionally from a single teasing link on a sexblog. I bet almost none of them came back. But I'm still getting an increasingly healthy number of genuine visitors a day - probably double if all you RSS feed readers are included. And, blimey, what a rise since 2003! Thanks. Total number of visits to this webpage in February 2008: 32006
(2007: 23082) (2006: 42277) (2005: 9636) (2004: 6917) (2003: 2141)
Count 2 (Google searches): I'm only counting these in case too large a proportion of my visitors are coming here 'accidentally' rather than deliberately. And they're not. So that's alright then. Total number of Google referrals to this webpage in February 2008: 3833
(2007: 3919) (2006: 3473) (2005: 908) (2004: 947) (2003: 316)
Count 3 (Blog content): I'm always convinced every year that I'm writing far more than I was last year, but this turns out not to be the case. OK, so this is my most prolific February yet, but not by much. It looks like I'm really astonishingly consistent, generating about 500-700 words a day. Good, I'd hate to think my blogging was increasing out of control like an addiction or something. Total number of words in diamond geezer in February 2008: 17606
(2007: 17102) (2006: 15817) (2005: 16016) (2004: 16214) (2003: 14392)
Count 4 (Spam): Good grief, what happened there? Not one willy-stiffener or potency substitute has slipped into my inbox this month! My magnificent ISP has managed to filter out every single spam message I've been sent since the start of February (damn, bar one brief Russian missive which slipped through late on day 28). I do hope they haven't deleted any of your real emails in the process. Total number of spam emails I received in February 2008: 1
(2007: 119) (2006:82) (2005: 54) (2004: 31) (2003: 30)
Count 5 (Nights out): At last, partial social recovery! I am no longer a complete after-dark hermit, having managed to go out every Friday this month and on a handful of other evenings as well. I think I've finally put my mid-decade drought behind me, thanks particularly to the permanent return of BestMate to UK shores. But I still have some way to go to return to the hedonistic days of 2003 - whatever was I up to? The number of nights in February 2008 I went out and was vaguely sociable: 7
(2007: 3) (2006: 2) (2005: 2) (2004: 7) (2003: 21)
Count 6 (Alcohol intake): That's my Becks intake significantly upped since last year, from an average of one bottle a month to one bottle a day. The figures suggest that my nights out are getting boozier (or just that I'm going to the cinema less often). But my Becks addiction still falls well within government guidelines on alcohol unit intake. Total number of bottles of Becks I drank in February 2008: 28
(2007: 1) (2006: 7) (2005: 0) (2004: 17) (2003: 58)
Count 7 (Tea intake): Apart from one dodgy year when workplace kettle usage was banned, my tea consumption remains wonderfully consistent. As, incidentally, does my coffee intake (still zero). Total number of cups of tea I drank in February 2008: 134
(2007: 137) (2006: 128) (2005:81) (2004: 135) (2003: 135)
Count 8 (Trains used): Again, very regular and fairly high. You can tell I live in London, can't you? Total number of trains I travelled on in February 2008: 117
(2007:100) (2006: 107) (2005: 117) (2004: 109) (2003: 103)
Count 9 (Exercise taken): I'd like to assure you that any apparent decline in escalator-climbing since 2003 is due to the nature of my daily commute, not to any increasing levels of breathless unfitness. Honest. I still walk up every escalator I ascend (and I can't believe how many of you lazy Londoners just stand there - wimps). Total number of escalators I walked up in February 2008: 33
(2007: 31) (2006: 35) (2005:38) (2004: 72) (2003: 73)
Count 10 (Mystery count): Sorry to disappoint you all, again, but the legendary diamond geezer Mystery Count continues to be zero. Indeed, it's not just been zero this February and zero last February, it's been zero since last February. Damn. Maybe next year... Total number of times that the mystery event happened in February 2008: 0
(2007: 0) (2006: 0) (2005: 0) (2004: 0) (2003: 0)
The Count 2008
