I hope you had nothing important planned this evening, because the end of the world is nigh. Praise be, for the Rapture is upon us and the faithful shall be uplifted yea even this very day.
1 Thessalonians 4:16,17 For the Lord himself shall descend from heaven with a shout, with the voice of the archangel, and with the trump of God: and the dead in Christ shall rise first: Then we which are alive and remain shall be caught up together with them in the clouds, to meet the Lord in the air: and so shall we ever be with the Lord.
For God has decreed that all People shall be judged henceforth, and that those whose souls are unblemished shall be spirited away to sit with Him at His right hand among His heavenly host.
Matthew 24:21 For then shall be great tribulation, such as was not since the beginning of the world to this time, no, nor ever shall be.
Fear not, for the truth is hidden in clear sight within God's Bible in plain words for all to see.
Revelation 5:23,24 And I say unto you the trump shall sound in the year of Grace numbered eleven and twenty hundred, when Africa shall rise and the east shall be smitten by waves of terror: for man abideth not: he is like the beasts that perish.
And the Lord has set in place the time of His salvation, when those whose eyes are open shall be saved and those whose hearts are closed shall be Left Behind.
Hebrews 2:7 Yea upon the twenty-first day of May shall the righteous ascend, at six of the clock precisely, measured by solar time at Greenwich as is God's will, so there'll just be time to watch Doctor Who first.
At His Moment of Glory the chosen few will vanish suddenly from sight, leaving behind all worldly goods in the blink of an eye. Henceforth those who observe this phenomenon must come to terms with God's will: that they are unclean, that they are unchosen, and that their lives may be in mortal danger.
2 Corinthians 6:19 Please take care not to be aboard a giant flying bird at the appointed time of Ascension lest any pilot who has led a blameless life disappears from the controls and the fuselage crashes flaming into the ground.
Five months of terror remain for those unclaimed by the Spirit, as conflict and plagues and earthquakes torment the world, culminating in fiery torment and ultimate Armageddon. Honestly, the Rest Of Time is not something you want to live though, and you should do all you can to repent of your sins before six o'clock this evening.
Matthew 12:8 And I say unto you, no man shall be saved unless he sell off all his worldly goods and convert the proceeds to cash and place the money in this online Paypal account but hurry because funds must clear before 6pm today thankyou.
This is God's incontrovertible truth, and not in any way a delusional con-trick.
Blondie 19:81 And you get in your car and drive real far, and you drive all night and then you see a light, and it comes right down and it lands on the ground, and out comes the man from Mars, and you try to run but he's got a gun, and he shoots you dead and he eats your head, and then you're in the man from Mars, you go out at night eating cars: He's gonna eat 'em all. Rapture.