diamond geezer

 Thursday, October 17, 2013

If you've had a rotten day, or are having a rotten day, here are 30 depressing things to make you feel worse...

1) The clocks go back in ten days.
2) Tomorrow is the last day that sunset in London is after 6pm... until March 13th.
3) People who try to get onto trains before anyone's got off, bastards.
4) When your new boss has a smile like sandpaper.
5) Global warming is on its way, because our generation is too self-centred to care about the next-but-one generation.
6) The American import of commercialised Halloween (no apostrophe) isn't going away.
7) People who turn left without indicating, then wave their fist because they almost ran you over, eejits.
8) When your new boss ignores you for four months.
9) There are still 81 weeks to go until the next General Election.
10) Cycle Superhighways not actually being super, in "blue paint" shock.
11) Mince pies in supermarkets in October, not because anybody needs them but because our society is broken.
12) When your new boss signs you up for something mega without telling you.
13) The X Factor won't crown its winner for another two agonising months.
14) Our collective future is one where everyone whose job can be replaced by a machine gets sacked, and is then told they're not trying hard enough.
15) Boris could be going places.
16) When your new boss announces a desk move in which you'll end up sitting much closer to them.
17) The "walking slowly down the pavement with your head in your mobile phone" event horizon is approaching.
18) Easter is still over six months away.
19) Inexorable rises in the cost of heating, just as the cold half of the year is imminent.
20) When your new boss turns up unannounced at your desk so that they can look very disappointed in public.
21) For every London cafe serving mugs of tea there are now ten chain coffee shops.
22) Our collective future is one where there's only enough work to go round if lots of us work part time, on half the money.
23) Java updates, and Flash Player updates, full of bloated additional features nobody needs.
24) When your new boss knows nothing of your workload, only their workload.
25) Miley Cyrus is number one. I blame Simon Cowell. And Twitter.
26) Someone put the idiots in charge at Flickr.
27) We live in a world where those in charge of services propose cuts to save money, and the masses nod blindly and say "yes, we must make cuts to save money".
28) When your new boss fails to get the answer they want in person so sends you an email instead (and copies in their boss).
29) The sidebar on the Daily Mail website, sigh.
30) The average life contains only 4000 Saturdays, and there aren't enough left.


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