OMG snow!!! That surely means traffic grinding to a halt, the termination of rail services and a commuting apocalypse. It means sledges in the park, weary pensioners shovelling ice from their driveway and hundreds of schools closed tomorrow morning. It means millions of photos of frozen streetscapes and fluffy back gardens all over your Facebook feed. It means... hang on, that's only sleet isn't it, the lying meteorological bastards.
Thursday 12th January, 18:00
That promised snow had better hurry up, because our media intern's due to go home soon, and we can't afford to pay her overtime.
Thursday 12th January, 17:00
We're no experts, but that looks very much like heavy rain to us.
Thursday 12th January, 16:00
Nothing feels quite so sweet as stepping into an Uber while your fellow travellers stand shivering at the bus stop, yeah? So today's the perfect day to download ride-sharing app Cabsnatch and take advantage of their amazing cut price introductory offer. "We use surge pricing to charge you more in awful weather," said chief investor Cassie Ridgeway, "so even 10% off barely scratches our profits." We say join the Cabsnatch party, and never ride with the smelly losers on the bus again.
Thursday 12th January, 15:00
Wrap up warm, London – snow is apparently arriving today and it's not likely to be the gentle flurry from the sky we wished we got for Christmas. According to weather reports we're getting 'thundersnow', and if you think that sounds pretty hardcore, you're right – it's basically the snow version of a thunderstorm. You've probably already heard that The Met Office have issued severe weather warnings which could see heavy rain and this freaky weather phenomenon go down this evening – hardly what we need for the commute home. But hey, it's just a little drizzly for now – and if we can survive a 24-hour tube strike, we can deal with a bit of thundersnow, right?
When Snowmagedon hits, where better to hide than Selfridges Foodhall, where nut butter gurus Nutsmith are opening a pop-up nut butter bar (yes, really), and serving up a selection of gourmet toast and nut-based toppings. Sourdough and avocado? For sure! Or better still take to the streets, because the folks over at Meatcrave have transformed one of London’s red buses into a fully-functioning barbecue shack, so you can cruise around London while chowing down on sauce-slathered flesh. N-ice!
Thursday 12th January, 13:00
Boffins at the Evening Standard are on the case, confirming that London has been placed under a weather alert with snow predicted today, amid dire warnings for rail, road and air transport. Not only have they paraphrased some information they've been told by British Airways and published a carousel of snowy photos from Scotland, but most importantly they've found tweets by sceptical Londoners scared by what their rush hour commute might bring. Mark said “[London] grinds to a halt frequently without snow!" while Betty joked: “Prepared for London to epically come to a total standstill because of a single snow flake #uggsinmybag @UGGUK #snow #London”. We hope Putney freezes over.
Thursday 12th January, 12:00
As the streets of the capital turn into ice rinks, it's not too late to book yourself into the real thing! Several artificial ice rinks opened up before Christmas, and are struggling to attract custom now it's midweek in January, so now's the time to book a sesh. Whether your blading skills are jaw-droppingly magnificent or utterly non-existent, the Midtown Ice Rink at the British Museum boasts several exciting extras to complement the extravagant surroundings. An iced path allows skaters to dash off from the main rink and glide below fairy light-laden trees, while a pop-up bar and restaurant serve everything from Scandi wraps to cheese fondue and hot buttered rum. See you there?
Thursday 12th January, 11:00
Who's scared of a few frozen flakes falling from the sky? Well TfL aren't, because they put out a press release as early as yesterday saying they were really well prepared for the imminent deep freeze. Apparently more than 100,000 tonnes of salt are stockpiled, which we think must be enough for several million tequilas, plus it's enough to last for up to 139 days' worth of icy weather. Wow, not even a Game of Thrones winter lasts that long! Your bus or train will be running for sure when the Siberian blanket hits. Sounds like we're in safe hands, London.
Top burger joint Heyspendo won't be letting today's snowfall wear them down, that's not their style. Their pre-advertised special offer still stands, with the brothers' signature pork and cashew confection being handed out for free to the first 25 lucky customers from noon. Wrap up in your scarves and mufflers sharpish, and hunker down to the epicentre of Haggerston for your amazing lucky treat, it says here.
Thursday 12th January, 09:00
It’s time to dig out your woolly wares as the city is set to get pretty chilly and there may even be some snow involved. The forecasting gurus at the Daily Express have told Londoners to prepare for SNOW HELL, with the whole of the country to be trapped in a -10C freezing double vortex for a week. Two colossal swathes of churning, freezing air will close in on London, triggering Arctic conditions which could last until spring, and it will feel very, very cold thanks to a lovely wind chill in the air. Wrap up warm, folks!
Thursday 12th January, 08:00
We heard that it might actually snow in London today - yes you heard us right, snow! Like you, we're breathlessly excited at the prospect of actual snow in London for the first time since some date we can't be bothered to look up. Snow is brilliant and fantastic, especially for boosting the Instagram likes on your next outdoor selfie, yeah? But snow is also terrible and dangerous, because it makes travelling slower, and Southern are already doing that job perfectly, right? So throughout the day we'll be bringing you all the latest snow news and snow updates, and we hope you'll make us your trusted social media channel of choice as this frightening crisis unfolds.