diamond geezer

 Saturday, April 30, 2022

30 unblogged things I did in April

Fri 1: The fan in my oven has broken so I'm living off hob- and microwave-friendly food. I'm sure they'll get it fixed soon.
Sat 2: I'm pleased to report that bus passengers still give up their seat when a Chelsea Pensioner boards.
Sun 3: Went for a 16 mile walk from Eynsford to Orpington, which would have been a 16½ mile walk but the Swanley New Barn miniature railway helped out in the middle.
Mon 4: In Leather Lane streetfood market the nearest I found to 'traditional' was a stall called Yorkshire Burrito (if filling Yorkshire puddings with beef, adding stuff and rolling them up like a wrap counts as traditional).
Tue 5: The latest incarnation of the Woolwich Ferry still takes significantly longer to dock than it does to cross the river (because the old boat allowed you to be approximate and the new technology insists you're spot on). With a One Boat service in operation it's an increasingly inefficient way to cross the river.



Wed 6: Somewhere In London I'd Never Been Before But Decided Not To Blog About - Clayhall Avenue: A long broad spine road at the heart of the Hainault Loop, resolutely interwar, with sweeping views of the Roding Valley and somehow still its original copper-roofed pub - The Unicorn.
Thu 7: I recommend you stop sending me nominee-touting emails, Victoria, otherwise you'll find yourself on the blog very much not in the manner you're hoping for.
Fri 8: Silinbbbdntba - Ruislip Gardens: Unpretty loop of an estate, Thirties-style, squished inbetween the railway and the Yeading Brook, backing onto seriously unwelcoming scrub and uncomfortably close to RAF Northolt.
Sat 9: Silinbbbdntba - Woodcote Green: Liminal Sutton, sufficiently far south of Wallington, where cottagey detacheds look out over greenhouses on earthy plotlands (but not as smugly middle class as actual Woodcote).
Sun 10: I tried to buy a ticket to Southend at Fenchurch Street and I have still not forgiven the c2c staff member for failing to add my Gold Card discount. On the plus side I caught a train that went over the Bow Road bridge that hardly any passenger trains ever use, so got a unique perspective on the road I live on.



Mon 11: The last business in Cooks Road - some kind of warehouse - has finally closed and is being primed for demolition, so within a few years this former industrial street will be all flats (and a Crossrail sub-station).
Tue 12: Silinbbbdntba - Holders Hill: Arterial outpost north of Hendon, just before the A1 merges with the M1, ideal for those who want to live near traffic cones but not any kind of shop, a prime example of unmemorable Middlesex.
Wed 13: Traffic along Chiswick High Road is at a crawl, either due to the construction of a segregated cycle lane or because that's how it's going to be now they've added a segregated cycle lane.
Thu 14: Silinbbbdntba - Ardleigh Green: Sweeping suburb beyond Romford pocked with sports grounds rather than parks, a twin-gabled pub that can't be as 1930s as it looks, front gardens big enough for two BMWs and quite convenient for Crossrail.
Fri 15: Box Hill Rambling Update - I felt jolly smug passing bank holiday ramblers on the precipitous steps down to Juniper Bottom, and precisely the reverse puffing up the precipitous steps to Mickleham Down.



Sat 16: Off to Norfolk for Easter weekend, and the heartstopping prospect of sharing the house with a two year-old German Shepherd I've not previously met. That is a very slobbery fanged jaw you have there.
Sun 17: I'm not quite sure how I managed 30 hours under the same roof, but I think it's because on the 'Interested in sniffing humans?' scale this dog's somehow only a 2 out of 10. I'd have preferred 1 though, or ideally 0.
Mon 18: Popped over to Chalet Wood for the best bluebell spread I've seen so far this year, as it seems did half of Wanstead for their bank holiday constitutional.
Tue 19: Silinbbbdntba - Sundridge: Bolt-on to Bromley with a shopping street Time Out would rate if it was in zone 2 not 4, unless that's technically in Plaistow, and acres of greenspace you can't enter unless you're a member of the golf club or have an apartment in the mansion.



Wed 20: The rubbish truck arrived ten minutes early to take away my recycling, indeed I handed my bags straight to the refuse operative, so I finally believe they take it away properly rather than bunging it in the back an ordinary dustcart.
Thu 21: Fewer than 100,000 Britons are older than the Queen, and by her 97th birthday next year she should be in the oldest 0.1% of the population.
Fri 22: Collected my Great British Rail Sale tickets from a machine in Stratford, and it took ten minutes because there were seven of them and I had to insert my debit card and type in a code each time, and got it wrong twice, and I apologise to everyone behind me.
Sat 23: Silinbbbdntba - Richmond Park (South): I thought I'd been everywhere in Richmond Park but no, I'd never followed Queens Road from Kingston Gate past Gallow Pond, through deer droppings and over squelchy ditches, past Thatched House Lodge (and wow-y wisteria) to Ham Cross... there's always a new bit.
Sun 24: I was in Dagenham and the tube was down, and a man with a poor grasp of English asked me how to get to Barking. I had to try to convince him that the bus which looked direct wasn't direct so he'd have to get off halfway, and politely drilled into him the changeover point and the second route. But he ignored me and stayed on to the end of the route instead, still miles away, where he got off and promptly asked me how to get to Barking. I tried.
Mon 25: They have indeed replaced the old 'Crossrail' signage at Tottenham Court Road station with new 'Elizabeth Line' vinyls. I'm not sure this is the most effective way of displaying directional information, however...



Tue 26: The worst bit of the extra-long train journey home from Southampton was at Gatwick when a couple with suitcases slunk into the seats opposite, opened two discounted packs of M&S salmon sushi, shovelled wasabi-soaked forkfuls into their greedy mouths, placed the empty cartons on the floor and then snogged briefly.
Wed 27: Sigh, not again. And overnight this time.
Thu 28: At both Dangleway terminals the posters that normally tell punters how much a ride costs are still covered over by vinyls saying "Pricing is currently being updated. Please speak to a member of staff". This is two months after fares rose by 25%. Staff have however been able to print and display a souvenir price list (fridge magnet £5) and a list of Ramadan sunset times.
Fri 29: Inflationwatch: Price of a 400g block of bogstandard Tesco cheddar... February £2, March £2.10, April £2.50.
Sat 30: The fan in my oven is still broken so I'm still living off hob- and microwave-friendly food. I'm sure they'll get it fixed soon.


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