Thank you for your many suggestions of tickylists I might want to tackle. To test their suitability I went exploring in Tower Hamlets yesterday, and am pleased to bring you part one of what might be a lengthy series...
Every Green Space In London Officially Designated As A ‘Park’ 1)St John's Park
Welcome to St John's Park on Manchester Road in the Isle of Dogs. It's irregularly-shaped and almost exactly one hectare in area, roughly half of which is taken up by a play enclosure with slides and humpy bits. Another corner is taken up by two porous macadam tennis courts, leaving a relatively small area for general exercising and picnicking. I can confirm that the park hosts a Man In An Orange Hoodie who visits, possibly regularly, to throw bread at innumerable pigeons. It also has some very nice metalwork, be that the gates at each of the four entrances or the pergola in the flower bed which is bedecked with iron birds. Tower Hamlets has over 120 parks and green spaces, of which 17 are specifically called Something Park, and that's just one boroughsworth so expect this feature to last for ages. Next up, Shandy Park.
Every Crescent in London 1)Jubilee Crescent, E14
Welcome to Manchester Road again. This is Jubilee Crescent, the jubilee in question being the Silver Jubilee of King George V in 1935. A company called R&H Green & Silley Weir Ltd wanted to create a set of retirement homes for former shipbuilders and this elegant curve of 28 flats is the result. They built larger flats downstairs and smaller flats upstairs, with access to the top lot very much not step-free so they'd never get built today. The rent was initially 2s 6d per week, the central balcony includes oval reliefs of the King George and Queen Mary and out front is quite a nice private lawn. It's remarkably difficult to tot up quite how many Crescents Tower Hamlets has, let alone the whole of London, but I know there are 20 crescents simply called The Crescent so probably hundreds altogether. Next up, Ordnance Crescent.
Every ‘Locally Listed’ Non-Designated Heritage Asset in Tower Hamlets 1)Bollards at Brokesley Street
Welcome to Hamlets Way, a footpath which hugs the northern edge of Tower Hamlets Cemetery. It used to be called Cemetery Row and has never been open to vehicular traffic, only those on foot, riding bikes or pushing carts. Within the cluster of bollards at the end of Brokesley Street one is modern concrete, three are smooth metal of indeterminate age and one is properly unusual. It's lower than the others with an octagonal tip, a subsidiary ring of recessed grooves and a ribbed body. It looks like a Gothic drill bit has poked through the pavement cracking the slabs as it emerged - very cyberpunk! It's marvellous but alas uncatalogued online other than as Tower Hamlets asset LS186. My borough currently has 210 locally listed buildings, including the road surface in Garford Street and a lamp column on Hermitage Wall. Next up, Morpeth Lodge.
Every Santander Cycle Hire Docking Station 1)Lindfield Road
Welcome to Lindfield Road, a street in Poplar where you can hire bikes. As you can see not many people have done this because almost all the docks are full, but this is not a particularly cycly part of town. Lindfield Road's docking station opened on 31st July 2010 and has 44 spaces. It's ideally located for anyone who intends to walk their dog in Bartlett Dog Park across the road, or who wants to visit the site of The Sussex Arms, a former pub on this very street corner. The closest residence is the recently built Mellor Court, which is not named after the currently Strictly contestant. London has 788 Cycle Hire docking stations so you can look forward to two more years of these reports, or just one year if I decide to cycle between docking stations to speed things up. Next up, Stainsby Road.
Every ‘Site of Importance for Nature Conservation’ in London 1)Elf Green
Welcome to Elf Green, a patch of grass roughly halfway between Shadwell and Limehouse. It's just off Elf Row, a cul-de-sac near Cable Street, but you undoubtedly knew that. Rarely have I been so underwhelmed by a green space, a half-mown arena surrounded by flats with bins in one corner and a ring of commemorative trees in the middle. What might have been a wildflower meadow is instead populated with nettles, and the only evidence of wildlife is a large curl of unbagged dogmess decaying on the lawn. Even the Elf Green community noticeboard is entirely empty, suggesting nobody really gives a damn. Tower Hamlets has 35 Sites of Importance for Nature Conservation so I hate to think how many of these there are capitalwide. Next up, Saffron Avenue Pond.
Every Council Waste Tip in London 1)Yabsley Street
Welcome to the Thames foreshore on the outside of the bend round Blackwall Reach. The northbound bore of the Blackwall Tunnel passes directly underneath which is why there's a mushroom-shaped vent in the corner of the site. Officially this is Tower Hamlets' Re-use & Recycling Centre because calling it a tip is passé, you're not so much throwing stuff away as giving it fresh life. Come inside and you can wave goodbye to white goods, furniture, gas bottles, books, CDs, engine oil, printer cartridges and old copies of the Yellow Pages. I've lobbed more than one microwave into its bottomless skips. That whiff is coming from the Waste Transport Station nextdoor where the dustcarts unload, so what a pleasant quest this is turning out to be. Next up, Kimpton Park Way (although I don't have Sutton ID so all I'll be able to do is stand outside).
Every Public Library and Seeing If They Stock A Particular Book 1)Canary Wharf Idea Store
Welcome to the Churchill Place shopping mall at Canary Wharf, a bolthole for bankers seeking a mid-morning Starbucks or a Barclays cashpoint. Tower Hamlets may call its libraries 'Idea Stores' which is a bit up itself, but hell yes, the majority are still open on Sundays. I decided to see if they stocked Wolf Hall by Hilary Mantel, because that felt appropriate, but upon reaching the shelves I was left disappointed. I also checked the Large Print shelves, the Audio Books and the Core Collection but no joy there either. I could have walked away with Bring Up The Bodies, but I know never to start with the middle book in a trilogy so walked away empty handed. By my calculations London still has about 240 public libraries, so this literary quest could continue daily until next May. Next up, do they have Moby Dick at Botwell Green?
Every UK Cheese Made With UK-Sourced Milk 1)Cornish Yarg
Welcome to the cheese counter at the big Waitrose in Canary Wharf. Tower Hamlets doesn't have hipster delis like many other parts of London so this'll have to do. I could have selected a hunk of Cropwell Bishop White Stilton or Wensleydale with Cranberries, alternatively Daredevil Chilli Organic Cheddar, Thelma's Caerphilly, Snowdonia Pickle Power or No. 1 Vintage Red Leicester. Instead I thought perhaps a wedge of Cornish Yarg - no doubt with a milky taste, somewhat sharp, simultaneously crumbly with mushroomy undertones. And then I thought hang on, there is no well-defined inventory of British cheeses, this isn't a tickylist it's merely a quantitative challenge, so I don't have to go ahead with this ridiculous idea. Seriously, what were some of you thinking?
Every Ex-Airfield in London:(mostly housing estates these days) Every County Hall across the UK:(not worth going to Carlisle for) Every Grade I Listed Building in London:(Waltham Forest is the only borough with zero) Every High Street/High Road in London:(this might bore you silly) Every Heritage Railway in the UK:(not during a cost of living crisis, thanks) Every Crossing of the Thames:(even Wikipedia can't manage a definitive list) Every Bus Station in London:(of seriously minority interest) Every Historic Drinking Fountain in London:("and oh look this one doesn't work either") Every Platform at Every London Mainline Terminus:(a properly anal challenge) Every Telephone Exchange in London:(if you're that interested, do it yourself)