As the phoney war before the next election escalates, I'd like to express my disappointment that the next government won't be as left wing as it should have been.
Just look at this.
These are Comrade Starmer's so-called first steps, a limp selection of depressingly weak promises which reads more like an apology than an agenda for change. How would Britain be any different under a Labour government if this depressingly anodyne recipe were implemented in full over a five year period?
It speaks volumes that Starmer chose to launch his mini manifesto in Thurrock, a red wall Tory stronghold in all but name, rather than surrounded by staunch allies in an area that's voted Labour all its life. You only had to look at the shadow ministers sat behind him in their grey suits - not a donkey jacket in sight - to realise that Keir has sucked the very soul out of what used to be a campaigning party.
The upcoming election is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to transform society leftwards and bring equality to all, especially the marginalised and downtrodden. Instead it seems the so-called Labour party is happy to pander to the needs of neo-liberals and mega-corporations with a wishy washy slate of pledges that promises to do nothing to improve the lot of the poorest in this country, except within six marginalised scenarios.
What is the point of waiting fourteen years for government if you fail to implement the most basic of socialist policies and merely continue the rightward drift of the current incumbents?
And what does Deliver economic stability even mean? We should be increasing the higher rate of income tax and introducing a universal wage for all whilst simultaneously ending the scourge of zero hours contracts, but instead all the talk is of woolly themes like fiscal rules and robust institutions, benefiting nobody the Labour Party was originally created to serve. Given the toxic shock an inept Tory Prime Minister delivered in just seven weeks, its financial repercussions still painfully evident, a Conservative defeat is all but baked in. Labour should therefore be promising nothing short of total redistribution of wealth because they'd still undoubtedly win, and if not now, when?
Our health service is itself on the resuscitation table as the Tories seek to privatise this much-loved institution by stealth. And yet all Sir Keir can promise is to Cut NHS waiting times, a target which ought to be taken as read whenever a Labour government comes to power rather than being anything startlingly new. It's patently impossible to trust Shadow Health Secretary Wes Streeting with his modernising views and emphasis on private healthcare solutions, indeed who's to say we won't all end up paying for doctor's appointments on his watch, indeed the health of the nation remains at risk of existential decline if a centrist government takes power.
When it comes to immigration it's time to reverse the populist rhetoric of the Braverman years and embrace the benefits of diversity. It's nobody's priority to Launch a new Border Security Command, that's merely oppression writ large in the face of a human rights tragedy, as you'd think a former lawyer like Sir Keir would recognise. We should be welcoming our migrants with reception barges in the middle of the English Channel and then packing them off to work in care homes, not to mention reversing Brexit because the will of the people undeniably supports a fresh start with our former European partners, and don't let the biased media tell you this wouldn't be a surefire votewinner.
On the face of it the promise to Set up Great British Energy is a positive thing, a bold move to tackle economic hardship and the inevitable scourge of climate change. But where is the promise to renationalise our water companies, ending the crippling bills which bleed us dry to pay shareholders and allow human sewage to pollute our rivers? Where too is the former pledge to spend £28bn a year on climate projects, or to impose a pay-as-you-go road tax on the most polluting vehicles, or to phase out coal 100 days into a new Labour government? The absence of these key issues from Sir Keir's list speaks volumes, whereas what we need are rock-solid aspirational commitments which precisely match our own personal agendas.
A plan to Crack down on antisocial behaviour sounds like something the Daily Mail would campaign for, not a key plank of a Labour relaunch. Are we so desperate for former Tories to vote for us that we abandon all our core values? Rather than rapping knuckles and advocating stop and search we should instead be opening youth clubs and investing in Sure Start centres, thereby empowering a new generation instead of demonising them. It's barely a decade since Tony Blair proposed introducing a mandatory new ID card for all, a draconian imposition Keir Starmer might easily reconsider, such are the dangers of electing an insufficiently progressive government.
Of all Keir's first steps Recruit 6500 new teachers is undoubtedly the weakest, an aspirational target which barely addresses the issue at hand. England contains over 24,000 schools so this pledge amounts to providing a new member of staff only for one in four, a drop in the ocean which entirely fails to "ensure that every child has access to high-quality education provision". More important is to reverse the assault on gendered toilets and the teaching of woke studies, issues the wider voting public would undoubtedly support if only they had been educated better themselves.
It's been five years since Jeremy Corbyn presented a radical agenda to the nation and was roundly defeated by an incompetent populist buffoon. Now is the time to try again, moving left to balance out the Tories moving right, rather than simply rolling over and telling red wall voters what they want to hear. We cannot afford to be pragmatic, we must embrace our egalitarian principles and offer policies which improve the lot of everyone on this island equally, otherwise what is the point of voting Labour... we might as well all stay at home.
It seems Sir Keir is insistent on courting the centre ground in an attempt simply to gain power rather than reshaping Britain, indeed he looks likely to win a landslide with his mealy-mouthed managementspeak and watered-down promises. We must therefore prepare ourselves for five long years of abject disappointment as a Labour government manages to be insufficiently bold with every policy choice and every ministerial decision. It might even be better if Starmer were to lose and we faced spending the rest of the decade under a cruel Conservative regime further rolling back the state and leaving the weak to fend for themselves. Only once every voter is screwed equally will the need for a proper Labour government become collectively inevitable.
