REGENT STREET Colour group: green Purchase price: £300 Rent: £26 Length: 1300m Borough:Westminster Postcode: W1/SW1
Welcome the fourth and final side of the Monopoly board. Regent Street is one of the board's younger streets and a rarity for central London in that an architect drew a line across the existing streetscape and said "OK, let's build that". It's unusual in that almost all of it is owned by the King, it being a jewel in the Crown Estate. It's always been showy, much like the Prince Regent was, hence the cohesive facade of Portland stone as it sweeps along the divide between Mayfair and Soho. And these days it brims over with posh brands and flagship stores, proudly promoting itself as "London's distinctive home of fashion, dining, wellness and lifestyle", so it may be world class but it's also a tad insufferable.
Parliament approved the creation of what was then called New Street in 1813 in "An Act for making a more convenient Communication from Mary le Bone Park and the Northern Parts of the Metropolis to Charing Cross". The architect was John Nash and his vision was a broad straight boulevard to rival anything in Paris, ending at the Prince Regent's new London residence at Carlton House. The alignment of the new road approximated to the line of Swallow Street, thus almost entirely wiping it from the map, but then had to bend on the approach to Piccadilly to ensure it didn't extend into St James's Square. By the time the street was finished in 1825 it actually commemorated a King, and Carlton House was demolished only four years later, but Regent Street still carves its unusual hockeystick-shaped course to this day.
What a lot of people don't realise is that Regent Street doesn't start at Oxford Circus, it starts a few streets north. But not so far north that it reaches All Soul's Church and the BBC, that's Langham Place, the correct extremity being the junction with Mortimer Street. The first shop on the first corner is a Farmer J, the 'fieldtray' lunchtime takeaway chain I blogged about last week, followed swiftly by purveyors of coffee, pastries and a useful branch of Boots the Chemist. Somewhere under the scaffolding is the main campus of the University of Westminster, an esteemed establishment since 1838, but Regent Street's first 200 metres aren't the highbrow home of anything, not unless you want to visit "London's first build-your-own cheese box bar" in which case Brityard has you covered.
Oxford Circus is a Nash creation and was originally known as Regent Circus North. The four quadrant buildings which face it were all replaced after their original 99-year leases expired, as were most of the buildings along Regent Street, hence most of what we see today is closer to 100 than 200 years old. Crossing from one side of Regent Street to the other has got easier since the massive X-shaped pedestrian crossing was opened in 2009, although if you turn up early on a Sunday you can pretty much wander across anyway. The steps down to the tube are topped by digital name panels that say OXFORD CIRCUS STATION for four seconds and then CAUTION FLOOR AND STEPS MAY BE SLIPPERY WHEN WET for seven seconds, even on days when no rain is forecast, because TfL are risk-averse obsessives.
Now 'proper' Regent Street begins, and also fundamentally changes. We won't be seeing anything as lowly as a Pret again, or indeed any opportunity for budget refreshment, only prestige brands like Omega, Onitsuka, Lacoste, Kiko Milano and Canada Goose. When you're the Crown Estate with power over every lease, you can do this. Top of the pyramid at this end of the street is the Apple Store, Europe's first when it opened in 2004 and since spruced up with the addition of 12 fig trees and (for what's worth) the world's longest luminous ceiling panel. The splendid mosaic armorials out front are because 235 Regent Street was once the London salesroom of the Venice and Murano Glass and Mosaic Company.
Onwards down the Portland Stone canyon. It's often overflown by a squadron of flags for royal events, Pride or whatever, but I managed to slip in during a quiet phase before the Christmas angels are re-installed. The roadway's not as wide as it once was, now with one lane each way repurposed for cyclists, a parking/loading stripe and extended pavements. The edges are also now littered with jagged wooden planters, 325 of them in total, introduced post-pandemic as a part of a self-congratulatory greening project. As for the paved central reservation, it's not meant for walking along but it does offer a particularly fine perspective when traffic is light. Ooh look there's Hamleys.
Britain's best known toy store has its roots in 18th century Holborn, moving to Regent Street in 1881 and changing premises twice before eventually settling here in 1981. Soft toys still dominate on the ground floor, the home of many a tempting staff demo, with Peppa Pig on 1, Barbie on 2, Monopoly on 3, Pokémon on 4 and Lego on 5. As a sign that things have moved on since you were a child, the current window display promotes an interactive plush toy called Daisy the Yoga Goat.
The middle of the street is peak global brand, with Kate Spade/Hugo Boss/Levi's/Reiss/Calvin Klein consecutively on one side and Furla/Hobbs/Barker/Tumi/Camper/Kipling/Belstaff/Churches/Hackett/Lululemon/Bose on the other, almost as if only one-word brand names are permitted. Strange sights I was treated to here included a convoy of revving Lamborghinis, a group of black-clad youth gathering for a fashion pop-up, a window dresser in culottes giving a mannequin's beige dress a tweak and a wide-eyed child about to board their first ever double decker bus. One group of foreign tourists dressed head to toe in Burberry gazed longingly inside its flagship store, having turned up much too early to do some proper shopping, and it struck me that on a Sunday morning Regent Street serves very little purpose.
The curved section is called The Quadrant and should be architect Norman Shaw's masterwork, except his monumental design ran into red tape, ownership issues and the fact that everyone loved his design except the shopkeepers needed to occupy it. After eight years he exasperatedly threw in the towel and Sir Reginald Blomfield took over, further delayed by WW1, and it was another 14 years before the full upscale arc was complete. The axial arcade is now "a world of wellness and self-care". The alleyway between Jo Malone and Hollister leads to all that's left of Swallow Street. Rough sleepers have bedded down in the empty doorway where Uniqlo used to be. A five course meal at Hotel Cafe Royal will set you back £195, plus drinks and tips, although you do get Kaluga Caviar and Brittany Pigeon for your money.
The brand sequence has descended to the levels of Nespresso and Whittards by the time we reach Regent Circus South, or Piccadilly Circus as it's now known. This is the third time the Monopoly board has brought us here, previously via the two yellows of Coventry Street and Piccadilly. Close by are the two oranges of Vine Street and Marlborough Street, one concealed behind the Quadrant, the other bearing off back at Liberty. Also aligned are the green of Oxford Street and then an entire edge of blue Mayfair, which perhaps makes Regent Street the Monopoly-iest property of all. If only it stretched south to pink Pall Mall it really would be full house but alas it stops 100m short.
Here's an oddity. Regent Street also extends three blocks south of Piccadilly Circus, or at least it did for a couple of centuries until 2014 when lower Regent Street was renamed. It's now officially Regent Street St James's, a tweak activated in the hope "that the renamed section of street will turn the area into a distinctive destination in its own right"... and the fact you've likely never heard of it suggests this didn't work. The Crown Estate would point at Osprey, Aspinal and Smeg as evidence of exclusivity, whereas I would point at Tesco Express, Ryman and a Post Office as evidence that perhaps it isn't. Perhaps it'll look nicer once a lot of the current scaffolding comes down. And perhaps best stick to the swish section between the Circuses.
