They didn't have blogs or the internet forty years ago, indeed my Sinclair ZX81 wasn't capable of much, but here are 31 things I didn't digitally publish at the time. To help you get your bearings I was 19 and December featured one week at university followed by three weeks at home. I'm amazed how infrequently I did anything or went anywhere. Sorry there are no photos.
Sat 1: Stay up until 3am playing board games with my flatmates, because we're not the sort of students to spend our weekends down the pub. I trounce everyone at The Great Game of Britain, Ian's best at Sorcerer's Cave and Hilary wins twice at Sorry! Wake up at noon, just in time to watch the Frog Chorus video on Saturday Superstore. Sun 2: A political argument breaks out over our jacket potatoes, which starts off being about student grant cuts but thankfully ends up being about cats which defuses things somewhat. Mon 3: Dealing in BT shares begins, an issue of 50.2% of the company which has been 3 times oversubscribed. The share price rockets by 86% on the first afternoon, with the government admitting it had priced shares low intentionally in the interests of promoting share ownership. Two of my flatmates are gutted they hadn't bought more. Tue 4: My Coco Pops magic ruler arrives in the post. It is so liberating being able to go to the barbers and ask for what I want, not what my Mum asks her friend Audrey to give me. Wed 5: It's Christmas Dinner night at college. All goes well until a brussels sprout lands unexpectedly on the table near Tony. A food fight breaks out which ends up with Jon becoming gravy-splattered and a college official threating fines. Jon is now a top lawyer who runs a practice specialising in tax law. Thu 6: It's Christmas Dinner night again, but this time for all those doing my subject. I wish we hadn't decided to go to a Chinese restaurant because I'm the only one who can't cope with chopsticks so plumps for steak and chips. It's a 3 course meal with wine and everyone pays £13.85. Fri 7: a) last lecture of the term b) Maggie Thatcher visits the university and I watch four students get arrested c) knock up the first of my legendary Christmas cards, the silver-penned Holly Bible d) get told by my tutors they don't think I'm as good at the subject as I used to be e) what the hell, off to the college Christmas party anyway. Sat 8: The party ends with Blame It On The Boogie and outdoor Christmas carols. Calm down later while watching the last episode of The Tripods. I hope they bring it back.
Sun 9: Time to pack up all my worldly goods so Dad can drive me home. Nothing much has changed although the light in the porch is now on a timer switch. My godfather pops round so I have to be sociable for a few hours. Mon 10: In the news today Stansted is recommended as London's 3rd airport and the ban on smoking in tube trains is to be made permanent. Tue 11: In the charts today Band Aid go straight in at number one and Wham's Last Christmas goes straight in at number two, unexpectedly knocking Frankie Goes To Hollywood down to 3. Wed 12: There is a yellow plastic lizard at the bottom of my packet of Coco Pops. We have corned beef for dinner. Thu 13: My brother is performing in the school play, playing an old grey-haired lord, so we all dutifully go and watch. My Mum reckons he looks like her sister. She also laughs at a lot of the dirty jokes. Fri 14: The BBC has to show a different episode of Blankety Blank tonight because the scheduled show featured Bucks Fizz's Mike Nolan and he's still in a coma after a car crash earlier this week. Sat 15: The double issue Radio Times arrives, it costs 60p this year, but then you knew that.
Sun 16: I haven't driven anywhere since September so my attempt to reverse into the front garden is pretty poor. My grandmother pretends not to notice. Out come our Christmas decorations, including the very old baubles and the box of lametta, and we spend almost as long reading the newspaper they're wrapped in as hanging them on the artificial tree. Mon 17: On Blue Peter Janet Ellis (or was it Simon Groom?) suggests you cover a matchbox with your obsolete halfpenny coins and gift it to your Dad for Christmas. I stash mine in my piggybank instead (which fortuitously means I'll be able to draw a bar graph of their years of manufacture in 40 years time). Tue 18: Go Christmas shopping in Watford so that I can pretend to be surprised when I unwrap all this stuff next week. Mum is very proud of buying me a shaving mirror, but I doubt I'm going to need it much yet. Wed 19: Margaret Thatcher is in Peking to sign the Sino-British Joint Declaration in which we agree to give Hong Kong back to China in the far-flung year of 1997. Should probably have included a few more democratic safeguards. Thu 20: Brave the drizzle to walk to the butchers to buy 1½lb of mince for dinner. I'm surprised when it's sold to me by the boy who used to sit next to me at primary school. Fri 21: It's turkey pie for dinner today, which seems a bit rash given what's pencilled in for most of next week. Sat 22: My godfather is back again, this time with his two daughters who need entertaining. We get down on the big brown rug and play Connect, the classic Galt Toys game where you try to link coloured tiles. Sun 23: It's a relief to be at the Carol Service these days without being the one expected to kick everything off with the opening line of Once In Royal.
Mon 24: There are last minute jellies to be made. The theme to this year's prize crossword is vowel-less trees. If I hear Bruce's "Santa Claus Is Coming To Town" again I may scream. Last minute shopping in Watford includes a Tears For Fears single in Our Price and a bottle of Emva Cream in Presto. The Chalk Farm Salvation Army Band turn up on Blue Peter. It's the last episode of The Box of Delights and (sigh) it was all a dream. Get the cards out and play Happy Families to avoid watching Val Doonican. Paper hats are not permitted in the choir at Midnight Mass. Tue 25: For the first time in my life there are no presents at the bottom of my bed to open on Christmas morning. Downstairs I open an £8 WH Smith voucher, a Mr Men calendar, a giant Toblerone, Captain Sensible's greatest hits and (oh look) a shaving mirror. Noel Edmonds is broadcasting from the top of the BT Tower. Our neighbours come round so we open the sherry. Turkey is eaten with all the trimmings. We have cotton wool snowballs instead of crackers. Robert Maxwell is a special guest on the Paul Daniels Magic Show. At Fred and Jane's insistence we play the card game 'On the Parish' rather than watch Wogan.
Wed 26: Lunch is reheated turkey and cold Christmas pudding, like it always is. I nibble my way through an entire bowl of peanuts. Mid-afternoon we go round to the house of a retired friend in Rugby Way. She's organised a treasure hunt with anagrams which Mum wins. A buffet tea includes yet more cold meat. Thankfully my parents bought a video recorder a few months ago so we can watch Airplane when we get home. Thu 27: Miss Marple. Last episode of M*A*S*H. Meltis Berry Fruits. Fri 28: Head to the sales in Watford to spend my WH Smith voucher. I can't believe the price of Parker ink cartridges has risen to 60p. Sat 29: The lunch menu has finally reached turkey curry. Sun 30: My uncle and aunt drive over from Epping for the afternoon, but I am permitted to stay out of the way to listen to the rundown of 1984's top 40 best selling singles. Radio 1 last played Relax 354 days ago. Mon 31: We buy a broadsheet newspaper so Dad can check through the New Year's Honours list and see if he knows anyone. The £ is at an all-time low against the $. Nobody's yet invented the Hootenanny so BBC2 sees out New Year's Eve with Big Country on Whistle Test while BBC1 stoops to Tom O'Connor and Moira Anderson at the Gleneagles Hotel. Blimey, I'm going to be 20 next year.
