Today the strongest storm in decades - Storm Eunice - is due to sweep across southern England. They endure worse up north but this one's closer to national media so is much more of an event. I'll be bringing you all the latest news as the gusty apocalypse unfolds, so stay tuned as my liveblog becomes your one-stop shop for all things cataclysmically meteorological.
07:00 Windy isn't it? 07:25 Actually no, it's just a bit wet, indeed you'd never know a fierce storm was barrelling in later this morning. But the Met Office has announced a red warning for exceptionally strong winds in London and the South East between 10am and 3pm, so brace yourselves. 07:38 Yellow, amber and red weather alerts were first introduced in 2011. There have only been 12 red alerts since, most of them in Scotland. England's only previous red alerts for wind were in February 2014, March 2018 (the Beast From The East) and November 2021 (Storm Arwen). London's never had a red alert before. 07:54 Overground services between Romford and Upminster have been withdrawn for the day, that's how serious this storm is.
08:11 The Met Office has been naming storms since 2015 because that makes us pay attention more. The winter of 2015/16 had the most named storms (11) and 2016/17 had the fewest (5). 08:30 Storms are named from an alphabetical list chosen at the start of the season. This year's list starts Arwen, Barra, Corrie, Dudley, Eunice, Franklin. If we get another after that it'll be Storm Gladys, and it's almost worth willing that to happen just for the LOLs. It's highly unlikely we'll reach Storm Olwen, let alone Ruby or Willemien. 08:36 The Dangleway is suspended, so that's a blow.
09:02 In specific hyperlocal news, Victoria Park is closed today. 09:07 Bins will not be collected in Devon and Cornwall, trains aren't running in Wales, Monkey World won't be opening in Dorset and buses aren't running in Cork. 09:23 Eight severe flood warnings are in force in the Severn estuary due to strong winds and a high tide. But the Thames Barrier won't be closing this afternoon because a large negative surge is expected "as the wind is effectively blowing the North Sea away from us". 09:33 It feels like the wind is starting to pick up. Branches are swaying. 09:57 Storm Eunice is an anagram of Rectum Noise.
10:00 RED ALERT now in effect. Sun's come out. 10:16 In an interesting juxtaposition of risks, all Covid-19 mobile testing and vaccination sites in London will be closed today. 10:32 Wind is strengthening. Spotted a leaf floating past. Looks quite nice out otherwise. 10:49 Also closed: the Isle of Wight ferry, the Severn Bridges, all the libraries in Southwark, Epping Forest District Museum, Bekonscot model village, public toilets in St Ives, Folkestone Town Hall, Harlow tip, the upper deck of the Asda car park in Edmonton Green. 10:55 History's most famous Eunice is singer Eunice Kathleen Waymon, who in 1954 changed her name to Nina Simone.
11:03 The first strong gust, thus far a one-off. Branches are rocking. 11:10 Balconywatch: I balanced four acorns on a chair first thing this morning, and one of them just fell off. 11:21 Reports of a 122mph gust at The Needles (which'd be a record for England). 11:30 The first noisy spell as the wind rushes, windows vibrate and a door rattles... then all goes quiet again. 11:32 Balconywatch: A second acorn has fallen. 11:53 It's getting a bit wilder out there, although because it's daylight I can see it's not as bad as it sounds.
12:04 The Manchester Evening News has cut and pasted the weather forecast as text and called it "Storm Eunice: Friday forecast for every borough in Greater Manchester hour-by-hour", and it's the second most-read article on their website #clickbait 12:17 Checking against the Beaufort Scale in my Ladybird Book of The Weather, I'd say it's more Force 7 than Force 8. 12:29 Over 150,000 people are watching planes trying to land at Heathrow on Big Jet TV (A380 incoming). 12:30 That Qatar Airways A380 has aborted at the last minute, again. 12:38 The Millennium Dome's roof is beingshredded by the wind. 12:58 Balconywatch: Remaining two acorns still in place.
13:00 A380 makes it down on third attempt. 13:09 It's officially now a big storm because a trampoline has been blown onto railway tracks in Norbiton. 13:11 Balconywatch: The last two acorns fall. 13:20 The tip of the spire at St Thomas church in Wells has broken off. 13:24 Balconywatch: Something fell over on the balcony above and splashed mine with water. 13:36 It's a good day not to own a fence. 13:47 It's still turbulent out there, but one of my neighbours just came home with a baguette so it can't be that bad. 13:59 The last ten minutes are as bad as it's got. A gust whipped up the alley. A window whistled. Two metal lids blew off. The trees in the park are flailing.
14:06 Balconywatch: I reset the acorns and they've all fallen off again. 14:08 Dome update - six panels missing, interior of shopping centre open to the elements. Tonight's Fugees concert is cancelled. Maximum gust recorded at the O2 was 87mph. 14:20 It feels like the worst has passed. 14:45 No trains out of Euston, Marylebone or Fenchurch Street. All Southeastern services cancelled. Bakerloo line suspended north of Queens Park, also Metropolitan line south of Wembley Park, also TfL Rail out of Paddington. Further trampolines reported in Herts. 14:53 Balconywatch: rosebush still intermittently quivering. 14:59 None of the trees I can see from my flat have broken, snapped or toppled over, so it can't have been that bad.
15:00 RED ALERT ends. Let's hope it's years until the next one.
