One thing I count every February is how many trains I travel on. But I was tallying something extra this year - the name of the train operator. And so I can confirm, somewhat excitedly, LAST MONTH I TRAVELLED WITH EVERY TRAIN OPERATOR IN LONDON.
This includes TfL, GWR, c2c and all the others that operate journeys in the capital.
I have not included operators that only operate outside London.
❌ CrossCountry, Merseyrail, Northern, ScotRail, Island line, Transpennine Express, TfW, West Midlands Railway
And I have not included operators that serve only one London station, it had to be possible to make a journey inside Greater London.
❌ Avanti West Coast, Caledonian Sleeper, EMR, Eurostar, Gatwick Express, Grand Central, Hull Trains, LNER, Lumo
This leaves 15, depending on your definition of train operator.
✅ c2c, Chiltern, Elizabeth line, Greater Anglia, Great Northern, GWR, Heathrow Express, London Overground, LNWR, Southeastern, Southern, Stansted Express, SWR, TfL, Thameslink
Note: Technically the Overground operator is Arriva Rail London. Note: Technically Gatwick Express, Great Northern, Southern and Thameslink are all part of 'Govia Thameslink Railway'. Note: Technically the Stansted Express is part of Greater Anglia. Note: Technically the government is the operator for c2c, Greater Anglia, LNWR, Southeastern and SWR but I treated them all as separate.
Some of these 15 operators are easy and some are hard. Here are the harder ones.
• The Heathrow Express only runs from London to Heathrow and is a rip-off. However it's free to ride the Heathrow Express between Heathrow terminals so that's what I did.
• The only LNWR journey within London is between Euston and Harrow & Wealdstone.
• The only Stansted Express service within London is between Liverpool Street and Tottenham Hale.
• GWR's only service between London stations is the Greenford shuttle (other than a few Crossrail stand-ins in the middle of the night).
• Chiltern have only nine stations in London, that's Marylebone, Harrow-on-the-Hill and seven stations up the line to South Ruislip, generally only served once an hour.
The rest are easy.
Two-thirds of my journeys last month were on TfL services (tube 124, DLR 25, tram 5).
I also made 23 Crossrail journeys and 16 Overground journeys.
Of the remaining 44 rail journeys, almost half were with just two operators (Southeastern 11, SWR 9).
For completeness sake I also rode on every Overground line and every tube line.
If I were a YouTuber I'd probably try to do them all in one day as part of a video called I HAVE BEEN ON EVERY TRAIN OPERATOR IN LONDON. But I'm not, and it would be quite dull. All of them in a month is quite enough.
I wonder how many other people have done them all in a year, let alone a month.
20 things we learnt from TfL FoI requests in February 2026
1) The assignment of stations to zones was implemented some 30 years ago, broadly fitting six concentric zones within the geography of London. Very few changes have since been made - generally only in very specific circumstances where any adverse revenue impacts could be mitigated. 2) There is no track-mounted rail running edge lubrication on the DLR. Lubrication of the running rail gauge corner/wheel flange interface is presently through dry lubrication sticks mounted on the B92/B2007 vehicles which contact the wheel flanges. However the new B23 trains are fitted with liquid flange lubrication. 3) TfL spent £8,439,102 on advertising costs in 2025, down from £8,609,454 in 2024. 4) In winter 2023/4 TfL gritted or salted 40,681 km of roads across 38 days, rising to 46,796 km across 48 days in winter 2024/5. The winter season does not officially end until April. 5) The full list of curtailment points on bus route 16 is Paddington, Edgware Road Station, Kilburn High Road Station, Kilburn Quex Road, Cricklewood Broadway, Cricklewood Bus Garage, Neasden Shopping Parade and Brent Park Superstores.
6) There are 6455 traffic signal sites in London, of which 245 have cameras that are able to enforce red light offences. 7) In 2024 there were 5 complaints about grafitti/vandalism/litter on the Central line, rising to 159 complaints in 2025. On the Bakerloo line the corresponding increase was from 3 to 77. 8) Last year step-free access was unavailable at Wimbledon Park station due to unavailability of staff on 245 separate occasions. 9) Route 309 was rerouted on the Aberfeldy Estate in August 2024. The promised additional stop has not materialised because the necessary submission from the borough team has only just entered the design review process. The location has been unsuitable for a temporary stop due to the presence of traffic, street furniture, guardrails, trees and bushes. 10) 86,305 passengers boarded route 25 at Bus Stop M last year, slightly more than the 85,818 passengers who boarded route 8. I'm thrilled to be able to bring you this pie chart of 2025 boardings at Bus Stop M. The tiny vertical sliver is for night routes N25 and N205.
11) Of all the miles cycled by cyclists across England, 22% are in London. 12) In April 2025 barriers were added to platform 4 at Ealing Broadway to prevent passengers running from the stairs to carriage 7 of Elizabeth line trains. This had previously been the location with the most accidents, generally caused by people running and then misjudging the step between the train and the platform. The barriers also encourage passengers to move further along the platform, reducing overcrowding. This is intended to be a temporary measure whilst longer-term solutions are investigated. 13) Buses on route 145 no longer serve Dagenham Dock station because Messina Way has been blocked while the owner of the road pressures the local authority to adopt the road, and there is no feasible alternative route. 14) TfL maintain a database of 20332 bus stop names and locations at tfl.gov.uk/bus-stops.csv 15) If the first cap-based journey of the day is made off-peak and a following journey is made at peak time, the off-peak daily travel cap applies.
16) The youngest person employed as an Underground train operator is 23 years of age. 17) Police Officers, Traffic Wardens, London Safety Camera Partnership officers and Civil Enforcement Officers are exempt from red route restrictions while undertaking legitimate enforcement activity. 18) During the last twelve months there have been 47 occasions on which pigeons have been culled at TfL stations or depots. 70% of culls involved the shooting of fewer than 5 pigeons. The highest number killed in one cull was 16. 19) About 800 people per day transfer between Bethnal Green (Overground) and Whitechapel stations, although this is not an OSI so they get charged for two journeys. 20) TfL's service vehicle fleet currently includes 523 Fords, 185 Volkswagens, 158 Renaults, 15 Volvos, 13 Mercedes, 6 Dafs, 3 Mitsubishis, 2 Isuzus, 2 Nissans, 1 Citroen and 1 Grove Coles All Terrain Hydraulic Crane.
During February 2003 on diamond geezer I kept myself busy by counting things. Ten different counts, to be precise, in a none-too thrilling daily feature called The Count. My 28-day tally chart may have been deathly dull to the rest of you, butI'vecontinuedtocountthosecategoriesagaineverysingleFebruarysince, purely to keep tabs on how my life is changing. Twenty-three years later I can confirm it's changed quite a lot and I have the data to prove it. Below are my counts for February 2026 accompanied by the previous statistics and some deep, meaningful pondering.
n.b. The month hasn't finished yet so all this year's totals are best guess estimates, but I'll come back and update/rewrite the post as February draws to a close.
Count 1 (Blog visitors): I said this blog had peaked and visitorwise it seems it has. After a couple of Februaries with over-ninety thousand visitors we're down to almost-eighty, and 3% of those were from a bot attack mid-month. But I'm still averaging 2900 visitors a day, or about 40 doubledeckerbusfuls, and that's just people who turn up in person rather than reading via the magic of RSS. When your average punter is more interested in watching short videos than reading text, what long-term hope is there for throwback paragraphs on a grey background? It amazes me sometimes that anyone comes back when there's the risk of reading about bus shelter design, obscure Cotswold villages or very old trees in Chiswick, which is hardly "must read" subject material for the online demographic. But I do try to provide a varied diet rather than endless recycled press releases, because I believe there's still demand for original subject matter daily. As one of my regular three thousand I assume you either keep coming back for the variety or can put up with the personally-irrelevant stuff inbetween. Total number of visits to this webpage in February 2026: 79455 (2004: 6917)...(2009: 26048)...(2014: 51727)...(2019: 69102) (2020: 66682) (2021: 65701) (2022: 69714) (2023: 77244) (2024: 93789) (2025: 97446)
Count 2 (Blog comments): There's nothing quite so unpredictable as comments. Some days this blog attracts hardly any, while other days the discussion catches fire and you add dozens. This month we've been averaging about 25 a day, which is alas rather lower than it's been over the last few years but still well above numbers in my first decade. For a blog in the 2020s I'd say it's also damned impressive. Most blogs either no longer allow feedback or have commenting zones resembling tumbleweed, but somehow you lot always seem to carry on talking, nipping in with a pertinent reference, a pedantic correction, a nostalgic nod, some schoolboy grandstanding or a bit of insider know-how. Admittedly it doesn't take much to set a few of you off, particularly if the topic is transport-related, and some days the gradient between sparkling and tedious can be steep. But one amazing statistic is that 280 different people have commented this month, chipping in when they have something relevant to say, and that variety is truly humbling. I also note that only seven people have left more than 10 comments so it really is a group effort. Thanks everyone, because it's you that helps to bring this page to life. Total number of comments on this webpage in February 2026: 695 (2004: 332)...(2009: 472)...(2014: 477)...(2019: 706) (2020: 702) (2021: 946) (2022: 850) (2023: 830) (2024: 861) (2025: 764)
Count 3 (Blog content): The number of words in my posts has been edging up and now averages 1300 a day. That's not to be sniffed at, indeed it's the equivalent of writing seven novels a year and I wonder how many of you write that much on a regular basis. I often start out thinking "I doubt this'll be a long one" but by the end have written loads because I've uncovered more along the way. Equally I fear I often write too concisely, packing loads of facts and observations into a single sentence when I could have written an entire paragraph. It's always a balance between adding detail and avoiding burnout, between making sure you have enough to read and making sure I get enough sleep. At least London remains a broad enough canvas that there's always plenty more to write about, which remains an excellent way to keep myself occupied. Total number of words in diamond geezer in February 2026: 36283 (2004: 16214)...(2009: 20602)...(2014: 32283)...(2019: 33361) (2020: 29099) (2021: 32122) (2022: 33056) (2023: 34291) (2024: 38040) (2025: 37049)
Count 4 (Hours out): On average I spend just under six hours a day out of the house, because if lockdown taught me anything it's to go out every day because you never know when that might no longer be possible. It used to be more like ten hours when I had an office to go to, but it's still a decent time to be out exploring. Have 60+ Oyster, will travel. I also spend just over six hours a day asleep, so if you drew a pie chart of my time it would be 25% Sleep, 25% Out & About and 50% Indoors. My trip to the Vale of Evesham was the longest I spent out (12½ hrs) and the miserably wet day beforehand was the least (3½ hrs). Total number of hours spent out of the house in February 2026: 163 (2021: 96) (2022: 113) (2023: 164) (2024:150) (2025: 161)
Count 5 (Nights out): I'm not an especially social person of an evening, as you can tell by the fact that this count only once surged into double figures. This February's trips have been no further than BestMate's sofa (where we watched Thursday night telly and put the world to rights), with no additional jaunts to pubs, restaurants, cinemas or the like. Admittedly I have also met up with people during the daytime but because this is a 'Nights out' count these bursts of sociability don't count. Don't worry it's all fine, and you'd never get a blog to read if I went out as often as I did in that heady February twenty-three years ago. The number of nights in February 2026 I went out and was vaguely sociable: 4 (2003: 21)...(2009: 7)...(2014: 6)...(2019: 4) (2020: 4) (2021: 0) (2022: 4) (2023: 4) (2024: 3) (2025: 4)
Count 6 (Alcohol intake): For the purposes of this long-term count my definition of alcohol had always been a specific gassy bottle of German lager. I clung to Becks for familiarity and ease of ordering, plus the fact it doesn't give me hiccups, but it's become increasingly hard to source in recent years so now any bottle of lager will do. That said, 100% of this month's total has been the genuine stuff because my brother managed to source a dozen bottles as a Christmas present and BestMate surprised me the other week with a giant bottle. The fact my total's still only three should convince you I'm no alcoholic. Total number of bottles of lager I drank in February 2026: 3 (2003: 58)...(2009: 4)...(2014: 4)...(2018: 5) (2019: 0) (2020: 0) (2021: 3) (2022: 1) (2023: 3) (2024: 0) (2025: 4)
Count 7 (Tea intake): Apart from one dodgy year when workplace kettle usage was banned, my monthly tea consumption has remained impressively consistent and always falls within a narrow range of 125±10. My mug total dropped a little after I left work because I was no longer desk-bound and kettle-proximate, and rose again during the pandemic for approximately the reverse reason. Things have now settled down, brown-liquid-wise, so I'm back to being a four cups a day man. Milk, no sugar, thanks. Total number of cups of tea I drank in February 2026: 116
(2004: 135)...(2009: 129)...(2014: 129)...(2019: 121) (2020: 122) (2021: 128) (2022: 132) (2023: 116) (2024: 123) (2025: 126)
Count 8 (Trains used): This count used to be pretty consistent too... always just over a hundred a month (unless the government decreed otherwise). But Februaries have become trainier recently as I zip around the capital on some ridiculous challenge or other, visiting all the stations or riding all the buses or whatever. For my first February with free travel I've been averaging 8 train rides a day, still not quite as many as 2024 but still an unnaturally high number, but it does mean that when I write about travel in London I do know what I'm talking about. For comparison the number of buses I've ridden this month is closer to four a day a day and the number of cars I've been a passenger in is 0. Total number of trains I travelled on in February 2026: 238
(2004: 109)...(2009: 103)...(2014: 129)...(2019: 135) (2020: 136) (2021: 0) (2022: 17) (2023: 141) (2024: 265) (2025: 163)
Count 9 (Steps walked): For me a normal amount of walking is just under half a million steps a month, i.e. about seven miles daily. That's lower than the ten miles I managed during turbocharged lockdown roaming, but also higher than the four miles I was averaging when I had an office job. I still reckon fifteen thousand steps a day is a half-decent total, and thus far it does seem to have kept my waistline below 2019 levels, but on the downside I have binned a few pairs of worn trainers recently. Total number of steps I walked in February 2026: 447000 (2014: 255000)...(2019: 464000) (2020: 405000) (2021: 671000) (2022: 627000) (2023: 434000) (2024: 452000) (2025: 427000)
Count 10 (Mystery count): Sorry to disappoint you all, again, but the legendary diamond geezer Mystery Count continues to be nil. I know, I'm as unimpressed about the outcome as you are. So near and yet so far, again, apologies. Total number of times that the mystery event happened in February 2026: 0
(2003-2026: 0)
Other things I've been counting in February
» Number of London boroughs visited: all 33 (at least five times each) [↑1]
» Number of bus journeys: 89 [↓31]
» Number of escalators walked up: 57 [↑26]
» Number of e-unicyclists spotted: 1 [↑1]
And I did suggest that you might count something specific during February 2026, so do let us know if you did. Life's more interesting when you count it.
Have you ever wondered whether the Royal Mail are failing to deliver your post on time? I'd long thought it suspicious that I go days without post then a whole batch arrives together, and that bills seem to arrive long after they were posted. That's why in September 2024 I tried The Royal Mail Experiment. It involved sending myself a letter every day for a week and seeing how long they took to arrive in my letterbox. It went well.
1st class: 5 letters took one day, 1 letter took two days
2nd class: 1 letter took one day, 4 letters took two days, 1 letter took three days
A year and a half later I've tried it again. Just 1st class this time, and just five letters sent Monday to Friday. But each envelope dropped into the box at a main Post Office in South London, as before, and all numbered so I knew exactly what had been sent when. And it did not go well.
Sent
Received
Monday
1st Class (1)
Tuesday
1st Class (2)
1st Class (1)
Wednesday
1st Class (3)
Thursday
1st Class (4)
1st Class (2) 1st Class (3)
Friday
1st Class (5)
Saturday
1st Class (4)
Two letters arrived the next day (1)&(3).
Two letters arrived after two days (2)&(4).
And letter number 5 hadn't arrived yet.
I waited.
Sent
Received
Monday
Tuesday
Wednesday
Thursday
some 2nd class mail arrived, but no sign of letter 5
Friday
One week after being sent, letter number 5 still hasn't arrived!
Until yesterday it could have been that no deliveries were being made.
But then some 2nd class mail arrived without it, and that's bad.
Either letter 5 is very late or it's got lost.
Saturday update: It was very late, one week late! That is appalling.
Sent
Received
Saturday
1st Class (5)
1st class: 2 letters took one day, 2 letters took two days, 1 letter took seven days.
The Royal Mail target is that 93% of First Class mail must be delivered within one working day of collection.
But they've only managed 40%, with one letter hideously late.
It looks like the mail round here is getting noticeably worse.
But you'd need to try the Royal Mail Experiment again to be sure.
If you want a weekly summary of rail-related transport news, Ian Visits and London Reconnections have you covered every Friday. I'm here again with a round-up of London's briefer transport dregs, bringing you the general gist without the need to click elsewhere.
🦸🏻♂️ From tomorrow northbound buses on Superloop route SL2 will no longer serve Ilford Sainsbury's, just Ilford station. Southbound buses will continue to stop twice.
🦸🏻♂️ The consultation into Superloop route SL14 (Stratford to Chingford Hatch) has concluded. TfL have confirmed it will launch as planned but with tweaks to stops at Blackhorse Road station and the Crooked Billet roundabout. The start date is 'during 2027', i.e. not soon. Route D8 will also be diverted to Stratford City rather than Stratford bus station to make room, even though hardly anyone liked that idea.
💷 Tube fares rise on Sunday. Rail fares, bus fares, Travelcards and daily caps don't. Tube fares within zone 1 rise 20p (and will have risen 29% since 2021). Percentagewise this year's worst increases are for tube journeys outside zone 1, all rising by 20p, as the Mayor continues to silently screw the suburbs. Five years ago these always cost £1.50, now they'll cost anything from £2.20 to £2.60, which is a crippling increase of 73% for z2-6 journeys.
⚠️ Advertising will be returning to the departure boards at Euston station on Monday, "outer sections" only. Officially it's a two week trial but obviously it'll end up being permanent.
🍺 Guinness paid £255,000 to sponsor Tottenham Court Road and Covent Garden stations earlier this month. According to the contract the activation was originally supposed to be 1st-7th December so must have been delayed.
🚽 The ticket office at Morden station has been reopened as accessible toilets, which is excellent. There are no confirmed plans to add toilets at any further tube stations, which is less so.
🚌 Free travel on routes SL4, 108 and 129 was due to expire on 7th April. It's now to be extended for an extra seven weeks, i.e. until Tuesday 26th May. The fact that London council elections take place in the middle of this period is probably not coincidental.
🚌 On Sunday 17 vintage buses will be running on route T15 (Trafalgar Square - Tower of London), roughly every 10 minutes between 9.30am and 6pm. It's a free ride, but donations are being collected for the Cars for Ukraine Appeal.
🛫 London Southend Airport now allows up to two litres of liquid in your hand luggage following the introduction of C3 scanners. On the downside they're introducing an £8 drop-off charge on Sunday.
🛫 On Sunday 8th March contactless payments are being extended to 20 more Greater Anglia stations INCLUDING STANSTED AIRPORT. Maybe they can unplaster the red signs at Tottenham Hale now.
🎨 An updated Art Map will be available at all zone 1 stations from Sunday. The booklet is free and includes 6 more works than the 2016 original. A series of pop-up artist and curator talks has already sold out.
🚶 Final approval has been given for the permanent pedestrianisation of Oxford Street between IKEA and Selfridges. It'll begin this September. Bus twiddles will be confirmed later.
🚊 All 54 new DLR trains have now been built. However none have operated in public service since an overshoot at Canning Town on 3rd November. Initial findings indicate "a combination of factures contributed to the issue". TfL say they are "working closely with all partners to reintroduce the new trains as soon as possible while ensuring safety remains our absolute priority", but reintroduction won't be before late summer.
🚇 Further delays in introducing the new Piccadilly line stock mean it now won't be in public service before Christmas. But it will be out on the line over the weekend of 7th/8th March while everything except Acton Town to Heathrow is closed.
🚍 Geoff Marshall has published a 23 minute documentary looking behind the scenes at Victoria Coach station.
🚆 Northumberland Park station in Northumberland opened on Sunday so there are now two stations called Northumberland Park, not just one in London. The final station on the Northumberland line, Bedlington, is due to open on 29th March.
🚡 The cablecar will be closed from Tuesday 3rd March to Thursday 12th March for maintenance shenanigans. This is an annual event so everybody's already heard the "inconveniencing nobody" joke.
🚧 On 9th March temporary traffic signals will be introduced around the big crossroads near Mile End station due to Thames Water work. They continue until July 2027, so expect hellish jams and delayed buses for months.
⛔ Charing Cross and Waterloo East railway stations will be closed for 22 days from Sunday 26th July to Sunday 16th August 2026.
🚇 On Saturday 22nd August there will be no service on the Circle, District and Hammersmith and City lines before 10.30am. The Metropolitan line will have no service all weekend.
Fair February brings the spring
With budding leaves and blossom bright
Fling wide your windows and rejoice
Everything's going to be alright
I hope you got outside yesterday, it was lovely. No cloud, bright blue skies and a Saharan plume pushing warm air up from the south. And yet it's February, this doesn't normally happen in February, it's more like something that first happens in March or April.
The sky clear blue, the mercury high
Nudging eighteen degrees they say
Dusk creeps again past half past five
For February means a fine spring day
The first 17°C of the year(1977-2026)
Feb
Mar
Apr
May
5 times
18 times
25 times
2 times
Over the last 50 years, using data from Hampstead, the first 17°C of the year has come in April exactly half of the time. March is nearly as common, whereas waiting until May is highly uncommon and last happened as long ago as 1986. Meanwhile the majority of those warm February bursts have happened in the last ten years, specifically 2017, 2019 and 2026, so it really does look like spring is nudging earlier.
Sunshine blazing from the sky
How lovely after all that rain
Pink and yellow, green and blue
Nature's waking once again
I've been surprised to see cherry trees already in full blossom across several London suburbs, not just the varieties that winter-bloom but bogstandard cherries bursting forth for their annual blazing fortnight. By the time Londonist gets round to republishing its usual "Generally April is cherry blossom month in London" article, sakura season will be over.
Bright flowers open far and wide
Courting birds begin to sing
Bumblebees zip twixt cherry cups
And butterflies are on the wing
It was proper pleasant out of doors with a lightness to the breeze and a flush of warmth. The last time it was this mild was in the first week of November, almost four months ago. It was easily warm enough for bees, busying themselves collecting pollen from sprays of cherry for extra-early honey. And so many flowers are in bloom you don't expect to see yet, including daisies, speedwell and even marigolds bursting out to face the sun down by Carpenters Lock.
Catkins hanging from the tree
The crocus with its orange throat
The blossom is already bursting
You do not need to wear a coat
Some people got caught out yesterday, leaving the house first thing as if it were still deep winter whereas it was already 10°C when the sun rose. Hello to the lady with her thick buttoned coat and tightly wrapped scarf who passed me mid-afternoon, having dressed for the calendar rather than the weather forecast.
Cast off your coat, roll up your sleeves
Reveal those winter-fresh tattoos
Make haste to parks and daisy lawns
Yes spring is here so share the news
I headed to the Olympic Park to soak in the spring sunshine and I was not alone. Hundreds were out across its sylvan acres, some promenading and others settled on benches and lawns engrossed in conversation or relaxation. Some small babies were discovering outdoor warmth for the first time. One group of students kept growing ever larger, their work for the day done and the diameter of their circle inexorably widening. A couple of them went all the way and took their tops off, perhaps ignorant of the fact it's far too early in the year for the incidence of UV to do much browning.
Bring your sarnies, grab some drinks
Roll out your rug and take the air
A pork pie and a hunk of cheese
The very finest picnic fare
I took a picnic to the highest point in the park and laid out a particularly snazzy 60s towel on the grass. I'd brought a proper plate and proper mug, plus a thermos from which to pour a full cup of tea. I enjoyed jam and cucumber sandwiches, a small Melton Mowbray pie, a slice of Red Leicester and a pack of Mini Cheddars. I had been intending to bring a Mr Kipling apple pie but forgot so had to make do with the healthier fruit instead. Sitting back I surveyed the skyline, savoured my feast and reminded myself I shouldn't yet be able to enjoy this, it's only February.
Top your tan up, wear your shades
Find a dry spot on the grass
Leaves appearing ever earlier
Shorter winters quickly pass
It's not necessarily climate change, these outlier spring bursts do occur from time to time. 1990 had one isolated 17°C day in an otherwise cool February, 1998 managed the same in the first half of the month and 2003 had a rare 16°C in late January. The greatest recent outlier was 2019 with a ridiculously mild 21.2°C at Kew Gardens on 26th February, the previous day now merely London's second warmest February day of all time.
December's daffs already drooping
January's ice no longer a thing
No need to wait for March these days
Fair February brings the spring
There are always weather extremes of one kind or another, but these days they're for warmth far more often than they are for cold.
Fri 25 Feb 1977: I was 11, nearly 12. It was the last day of half term. Went into Rickmansworth and bought a magic book in Smiths. Played Top Trumps. Read my copy of Puffin's Pleasure, a hardback targeted at members of the Puffin Club ["a unique collection designed to entertain readers of nine and over"]. Sat 25 Feb 1978: Watched Multi-Coloured Swap Shop with guests including Richard Stilgoe and Penelope Keith, then later Jim'll Fixit. It was the last ever night of our choirmaster's special extra practice for the top boys, our final opportunity to be plied with cream cakes and fizzy Corona pop. We all departed with a £5 note, no questions asked. Sun 25 Feb 1979: Our school choir was on a half term trip to Watford's twin town of Mainz. This was the first full day after a 24 hour coach journey via Zeebrugge. I opted for cereal at breakfast rather than risk the cold meat. It was Carnival weekend, just before Lent, which they take very seriously here. Went on the dodgems, walked by the Rhine and waved sparklers. I also met the boy I'd be going on German Exchange with over Easter and realised I couldn't speak the language yet. Made plans for where we'd watch the big Rose Montag parade tomorrow [wow, that was quite something]. Played Connect 4 for the first time [they do love their board games, these Germans]. Mon 25 Feb 1980: First day back after the holidays. Guy had a very brown face having been skiing without protection. [OMG, it's the day we had that lesson. I've long thought it never happened but I see it actually did, which is the benefit of keeping a diary. I'd like to go back and sue the teacher for not teaching it properly because quite frankly what a waste]. After school I played a bird of prey in the school play rehearsal. Watched the very first episode of Yes Minister. Wed 25 Feb 1981: Up late because a car crashed outside the house overnight so there were police, fire engines and flashing lights opposite. I got left alone in the house before lunch, during which hour some Jehovah's Witnesses called, then our neighbour came round to avoid the Jehovah's Witnesses, then a wrong number called, then the electricity meter man came round and poked around under the stairs, then I had to take them two houses up the road to poke under their stairs. Only then could I get back to reading A Clockwork Orange.
Thu 25 Feb 1982:[Weren't half terms late in those days?] Mum went into Watford to buy biscuits for Guide Camp and Dad went to the rates tribunal to try to get ours reduced due to non-cutting of the grass verge outside. I was left at home to answer the door to the TV repair man. Depeche Mode, Bow Wow Wow, the Associates, Haircut 100 and The Jam were on Top of the Pops. Then the very first episode of the Kenny Everett TV Show, all in the best possible taste. Fri 25 Feb 1983: Had Crunchy Nut Corn Flakes for breakfast. In our form room we played two board games before school started (won both) and two more over lunchtime (lost both). I wonder what the classes of less geeky sixth formers were doing. Our Friday afternoon lecture was about prison rehabilitation and 20 minutes longer than usual, which basically pissed everyone off. Sat 25 Feb 1984: My college mates decided to spend the weekend in Cambridge because Patrick lived there. Sorry I dropped your sugar jar on the kitchen floor. Pub lunch in Ely (I had the plaice), then looked at the stained glass in the cathedral. It was very cold. Back to the Eros Greek restaurant for dinner (I had the roast lamb) because Sweeney's was full. Mon 25 Feb 1985: The pound was plummeting, eek $1.05! One of the year's more comprehensible lectures this morning. Andy bought some dart flights, Ian bought the Art of Noise album and I had steak and kidney pie for lunch. 3800 miners went back to work. It was a rare hard graft day, working collegiately in the library and then staying up until 3am to try to finish some annoyingly damp questions. Tue 25 Feb 1986: The coldest February day since 1947 and the heater in my room was still broken. As well as handing in some poorly-answered questions I was also agonising over future career choices. Photocopied my CV and pushed myself to write a covering letter [but they weren't interested and it took another 15 years to get a job in London]. Sigue Sigue Sputnik were a new entry in the Top 10.
Wed 25 Feb 1987: I was 21, nearly 22. I'd nipped home from Hull, returning up north tomorrow. Mum dealt with the gas meter man and I dealt with the electricity meter man. Lunch was a piled-high sandwich. My auntie came round and I tried not to overhear all the gossip about adultery and gynaecological issues. Tried to impress Mum by cooking an apple crumble, and I think she was even though she refused to eat it. The rest of us enjoyed it with custard. Thu 25 Feb 1988: I was staying overnight with a chemist in Liverpool, and might have got some sleep if I'd remembered to bring a sleeping bag. When they went to work I wandered round the Pier Head, then got the train to Preston, then settled into my reserved seat to Edinburgh. The Borders were cloudy and the train was late. Walked to the New Town where I was staying with a medical student. Met her future husband for the first time and they surprised me with haggis. Sat 25 Feb 1989: Bought a newspaper, had steak and kidney pie for lunch, washed my hair. Sun 25 Feb 1990: Bought a newspaper, had lamb and apple crumble for lunch, washed my hair. Mon 25 Feb 1991: Kicked off the Comic Relief preparations at work [which would eventually see me on the front of the local paper].
Tue 25 Feb 1992: I was enjoying a few days in Norfolk [which my parents had just moved to]. We risked driving into Norwich through the fog and discussed my brother's new girlfriend who I met for the first time yesterday [they're still together!]. Bought some lampshades and red curtains for my new flat. Also bought XTC's English Settlement on CD for me and Jennifer Rush's Power of Love for Mum, so that was two birthday presents sorted. Lunch on the top floor of Debenhams (steak and kidney pie, obviously). Thu 25 Feb 1993: Maria got Joan's job. French and Saunders hadn't improved. Fri 25 Feb 1994: Thanks Ken! Wasted our group time filling in the overhead projector acetate. After work the police dropped in to interview me about last weekend's murder. Tonight's blind date went well when it turned out we both did the same job [but didn't lead anywhere]. Sat 25 Feb 1995: When I woke up the plan was to go out on the town in Luton this evening, but perhaps wisely we ended up in the Engine & Tender instead. Took a chance and rang Ampthill, but damn I only got the answerphone [and would never get a reply]. The prize for the very last Don't Forget Your Toothbrush was a car rather than a holiday. Sun 25 Feb 1996: Bought a newspaper, had mince for lunch, washed my hair.
Tue 25 Feb 1997: I was 31, nearly 32. The stormiest night since 1990 apparently. Michael said he was resigning from work to focus on sport instead [though it was his wife that'd get the big medal]. The Brit Awards were so dull I switched over to Brookside in the ad breaks. Wed 25 Feb 1998: Five weeks in, my relationship was going well. However midweek we could only do long distance phone calls. Sorry you're in a state. Why would anyone bequeath you a chapel? Yes I probably would let you do that. Let's do Pitsea and Battlebridge at the weekend. Thu 25 Feb 1999: One year on, my relationship was going badly. You told me not to ring this morning so it's not my fault you woke up three hours late. No I do not want you to buy a dog. Why can't you get time off for the eclipse? Go and sleep with Sean see if I care. Oh it's over is it? [It wasn't] Fri 25 Feb 2000: Yesterday was a huge relief, no ill after-effects. Today Abbey National confirmed the bastard's finally paid up. Headed back to London for Mark's 38th birthday party and met all his mates from the industry I failed to get into 14 years ago. [I'm quite glad I don't have to tell you everything that happened on February 26th] Sun 25 Feb 2001: Bought a newspaper, had mince for lunch, downloaded several tracks on Napster (painfully slowly). [I was exactly six months away from getting the keys to my flat in London, and you already know how that turned out]
Some London bus routes are straightish, some wiggle and some go all round the houses. But only a few go fully back on themselves, setting off round a big loop before returning to where they were a few minutes ago. So what are London's loopiest bus routes, those where you look out of the window and sigh "oh look, we're back here again"?
Note 1: The route has to return to exactly where it was. Note 2: I'm not including circular routes, because obviously they end up where they started. Note 3: I'm not especially interested in loops that only serve one stop. Note 4: I'm not especially interested in loops of less than 500m. Note 5: I hope I haven't missed anything important.
What precisely counts as the loopiest route depends on definitions, so here are several possibilities.
The loopiest route by distance
Route 463: Pollards Hill to Coulsdon South Loop: 4.1 km (2.6 miles)
The 463 is one of London's lower tier bus routes, added in 1998 to connect a disparate collection of outer London backstreets. It runs every 20 minutes through council estates, across commons, round industrial estates and down to almost the very southern edge of the capital. Its maximal loopiness is to serve the Clock House estate, an exclave of Sutton, hemmed inbetween a railway line and various uncrossed forms of greenspace. The 463 thus gets very nearly to Coulsdon town centre then bears off in the general direction of Woodmansterne station to do a giant loop of the backstreets.
The first 300m are done both ways, then comes a circuit 10 times longer which passes Sutton's southernmost pub, some very lowly shops and a lone Methodist Church. The most convoluted part occurs when the bus deliberately veers down a desperately fortunate avenue of white-fronted semis whose back fences mark the Surrey border, then runs shy and heads back past the station. The whole circumnavigation takes about ten minutes, and if you live in Coulsdon you soon learn that if you skip it by alighting early you can be in Waitrose before the 463's even doubled back.
Also with loops over 1km: B11, U10, 326, R3, 224, 491, 265, G1, K5, W9, 473, 474, 303, 189, 200, B14, 384, 248
BUT there's only one actual bus stop on the 463's 4km circuit (at The Mount), all the rest being Hail and Ride. So if we define 'loopiest' by number of stops we get a different answer.
The loopiest route by number of bus stops
Route 359: Purley to Addington Village Loop: 11 stops
The 359 is another of London's lower tier bus routes, added in 1998 to bring a bus service to Monks Hill for the first time. This outlier estate in Selsdon was built on sloping downland in the late 1940s and is impenetrable on three sides except on foot. The top of the estate was over 600m from existing bus services on Selsdon Park Road and TfL don't like leaving residents floundering beyond 400m, hence the introduction of the 359 as a rare kindness. It's also one of London's least frequent buses, reduced in 2022 from every 30 minutes to every 45, an economy which allowed TfL to use one less vehicle on the route. As mystery tours go, it feels interminable.
If it were possible to manoeuvre a bus directly into Tedder Road this wouldn't need to be a loop at all, the 359 could execute a lengthy wiggle without ever repeating a street. But someone must have decreed there's only one safe way in and out, this via Farnborough Avenue, hence the ridiculous 11-stop loop becomes forced. It weaves between semis, then up the side of a pleasant green before following the edge of a school playing field (seriously, the Quest Academy?). At the top of Broadcoombe are fine views, a path into woodland and a very postwar church, then the 359 heads back down past everyday scenes and out the way it came. I timed it yesterday and it took nine minutes, which is why only those who live in Monks Hill catch this single decker and everyone else catches the 64 direct instead.
8 stops:404: Tollers Lane estate (2.5 km/1.5 miles) 8 stops:B11: Bostall Heath (n/b only) (2.3 km/1.4 miles) 8 stops:W9: Highlands Village, Winchmore Hill (1.6 km/1.0 miles) 7 stops:491: Enfield Island Village (1.7 km/1.1 miles) 7 stops:265: Roehampton Estate (1.7 km/1.1 miles)
The W9's detour round Highlands Village is forced because the estate was built on the site of the former Highlands Hospital, hence has no road connection into any of the adjacent estates. The 491 has to retrace its steps because there's only one bridge over the River Lea into Enfield Island Village. And I curse every time the westbound 265 deviates into the Roehampton Estate, then again when it's not allowed to turn right on leaving and has to negotiate excruciatingly round the drinking fountain instead.
The loopiest route by total bus stops
Route 404: Cane Hill to Caterham-on-the-Hill Loops: 12 stops
The 404 wins here because it has two looping sections, one round Coulsdon town centre and one at the top of Happy Valley. Neither loop existed before 2020 when TfL conjured up an even wiggler route than before to serve some impressively remote streets on the Green Belt fringe. The 404 is thus the only route to follow the Coulsdon bypass, this so it can serve the high street southbound in both directions, which contributes 4 looped stops to the total. Later in its convolutions it squeezes off Coulsdon Road to do a circuit of the Tollers Lane estate, a drab tongue of 300 council homes nestled in idyllic settings, where alighting at The Admirals Walk brings you to the verdant brim of the Surrey Hills AONB. This section has 8 stops, two of them essentially unnecessary because buses go past both ways, hence with 12 stops altogether the 404 is arguably London's loopiest bus.
The loopiest routes by total distance
Routes R5/R10: Orpington to Knockholt Loops: 4.4 km (2.7 miles)
I know I said I wasn't including circular routes, but even if you only go halfway these exceptionally rural routes deliver two decent loops. One is the double run from Knockholt to Halstead and back which is two miles altogether, and the other is the double run into Orpington town centre which adds the 0.7. The alternating R5 and R10 are TfL's least frequent bus routes, each running every 150 minutes, and no Londoner has true bus geek credentials until they've ridden at least one all the way round.
Route 224 looks like it was drawn by a madman, a sinuous scribble that weaves ridiculously round Neasden, Harlesden and Park Royal. Its first loop is needed to access Neasden's IKEA and Tesco, which takes either one or one-and-a-half large circuits depending on direction. Within the Park Royal estate is a 1-stop loop to reach Central Middlesex Hospital and then immediately a separate 3-stop route round Asda. Finally the 224 does an insanely generous double run to serve a few houses in Twyford, negotiating awkwardly round Iveagh Avenue.
Until 2019 there was a fifth loop to tick off Alperton Sainsburys but thankfully that's vanished. Then in 2024 TfL launched a prudent consultation to remove three more of these loops, a change which they intended to introduce last year but hasn't happened yet. When it does the G1 will become London's loopiest bus with three agonising deviations in the vicinity of Tooting Hospital, but until then the 224 takes the quadruple crown.
Note 5: I hope I haven't missed anything important.
Norbiton is a suburban residential area in the Royal Borough of Kingston upon Thames, southwest London. Located approximately 1 mile east of Kingston town centre, it is a popular commuter hub known for its mix of historical architecture and community-focused atmosphere.
Key Landmarks & Attractions
• Kingsmeadow Stadium: Currently the home ground for Chelsea F.C. Women. It has a rich sporting history, previously serving as the home for AFC Wimbledon and Kingstonian F.C.
• Kingston Hospital: A major NHS hospital serving the wider Kingston and Surrey area, located near the railway station.
• St Peter’s Church: A prominent Anglican parish church designed by architects Gilbert Scott and William Moffatt in the 1840s.
• Kingston Cemetery: Opened in 1855, it is one of the area's significant green spaces.
Transport Connections
• Norbiton is highly accessible for commuters into central London.
• Norbiton Railway Station: Provides direct South Western Railway services to London Waterloo in approximately 25 minutes.
• Crossrail 2: Future plans include Norbiton as a stop on the Crossrail 2 route, which would provide increased frequency and step-free access.
History & Heritage
• Origins: The name Norbiton derives from Old English, meaning "northern farm," reflecting its origins as pastureland north of the Hogsmill River.
• Norbiton Hall: Originally a 16th-century manor, the site now hosts 1930s-style flats that are locally listed for their architectural merit.
• Cesar Picton: A notable 18th-century resident who lived at Norbiton Place. Originally an African slave brought to England as a child, he became a successful and wealthy coal merchant in Kingston.
Living in Norbiton
• The area offers a blend of housing types, from large Victorian and Edwardian family homes to modern social housing developments.
• Community: Local groups like One Norbiton work on neighborhood improvements and community engagement.
• Regeneration: The Cambridge Road Estate (famously used as a filming location for The Bill) is currently undergoing a major regeneration project to build over 2,000 new homes.
• Amenities: Independent cafés and shops are concentrated along Kingston Road, and the area is a short walk from the expansive Richmond Park.
...a suburban residential area approximately 1 mile east of Kingston town centre. Norbiton is a popular commuter hub to the north of the Hogsmill River, hence the name, also the site of the distinctly-chimneyed Kingston Hospital. It was once more obviously distinct from its larger neighbour but these days everything just merges together, so if you walk east and don't find yourself in Canbury you're probably in Norbiton instead.
Norbiton was once characterised by big houses like Norbiton Hall, Norbiton Place, Kingston Lodge and Norbiton Park, but at some point it was decided they'd be better off as housing for common people so they were all flattened. Only Norbiton Hall has a plaque on the wall of its replacement flats, reminding residents that such luminaries as George Evelyn, Sir Anthony Benn and a Prime Minister's widow once deigned to live here. St Peter's Church occupies part of the grounds of Norbiton Place and was designed by Sir George Gilbert Scott before he was a Sir, while another part which used to be a lake is now an Asda.
Football has always been big in Norbiton, ever since Kingstonian hadn't quite gone into administration, after which AFC Wimbledon moved in until they got their own place in Merton proper. Nowadays Chelsea Women play here, as you may have read above, thrashing Manchester United Women at Kingsmeadow yesterday to progress through to the FA Cup quarter finals. I could additionally mention Norbiton station except that's also been covered earlier, also the existence of Kingston Cemetery and the fact there are several independent cafes. I can tell you that these eateries include To Kefi, Deer Cafe and the newest branch of Farm & Flynn which opened this weekend, all of which were busy yesterday morning. Not that you're particularly interested.
It's no good, I've had all my thunder stolen by the AI Overview inserted at the top of the post. Nobody asked for it, the software just bunged it in, plus there's no way to turn it off or insist it never does it again. It contains all the key gobbets of information about Norbiton, each scraped from online sources elsewhere rather than properly researched, and laid out in easy-to-digest bullet points instead of proper paragraphs. Once you've read that it's quite hard for me to introduce anything significantly new, rather than delve into local minutiae like the dolls house in Lucie White's window, the footbridge on Orchard Walk and the reason why Big Daddy's Clearance is based at the car wash. It means most people hoping to find out about Norbiton will never discover what I wrote, instead satisfied by the sterile summary in the AI Overview, so I may just be wasting my time.
1926: Kenneth Charles was born to Charles and Lousia Williams in a 1-bed flat at 11 Bingfield Street, just off Caledonian Road. The entire street's been redeveloped so there's nothing to see here, other than a green plaque on the replacement house unveiled by Sheila Hancock in 2010.
1928: The family moved to Flat 14 on the third floor at Cromer House on Cromer Street, King's Cross.
These are Whidborne Buildings, erected by the East End Dwellings Company in 1891. Several of their philanthropic blocks survive along Cromer Street, with Kenneth's comprising over 200 small flats stacked around a central courtyard. In his day you could wander in and out at will but these days access is via three keypadded gates, also a significant amount of shrubbery has been planted in what would once have been a utilities and kickabout space, also signs now warn 'No Ball Games'. The flats overlooked Whidborne Street, which is still part-cobbled and with a proper throwback garage on the bend displaying the telephone number TER 4577. It's a rare inner London neighbourhood where you can still imagine how things would have looked in Kenneth's day, so long as you ignore the designer handbag shop on the corner, also the Italian restaurant and yoga studio that now bookend egress from the flats.
Cromer Street features heavily in the BBC documentary Comic Roots, filmed in 1983, in which Kenneth revisits his childhood haunts. It's a fabulously nostalgic look at life in the 30s and the 80s, and because Kenneth talks ten to the dozen crams a heck of a lot into 30 minutes. It was also shown on BBC4 last night so you can watch it now, plus it's on YouTube in full, thus a recommended way to celebrate today's centenary.
In the documentary KW remembers how his neighbours used to push their piano down the street to The Boot for a communal singalong, and that trad boozer is still there today should you fancy a birthday pint over roast lamb shank. I did wonder if Ken and chums would have played in the gardens behind Holy Cross church across the street, but no that was all houses in their day and is now just a bombsite nobody's ever built over.
1931: Kenneth didn't have to go far for his early education, barely a one minute walk round the corner to Manchester Street School. It's very Edwardian and five storeys high to cram in as many classrooms as possible in a restricted space. It was while here that an English teacher suggested Kenneth take part in the school play 'The Rose and the Ring' (a story he'd later tell on Jackanory) and he duly stole the show as Princess Angelica. These days it's Argyle Primary, this because Manchester Street has since been renamed Argyle Street, and I note they're both a Beacon Peace Promoting School and proud holders of a TfL bronze.
1935: The Williams clan went up in the world when Charlie took over a hairdressing shop on Marchmont Street, close to what's now the Brunswick Centre in Bloomsbury, with Kenneth taking the bedroom on the top floor. His Dad's speciality was doing Marcel waves, as signalled by a wiggly wig in the front window. Number 57 is still a hairdressers today but they do highlights and restorative conditioning, which wouldn't have been the Williams style at all, and the price of a gent's cut has shot up to £34. In 2010 a blue plaque was unveiled above the shampoo-stacked window amid much pizazz with Nicholas Parsons amongst the invited guests. The screed confirms that Kenneth lived here from 1935 to 1956 which, even allowing for wartime shenanigans in the Far East, makes it the longest-serving of all his residences.
This short section of Marchmont Street boasts a dazzling array of blue plaques including painter William Henry Hunt, poet William Empson, actor Emlyn Williams and composer William Reeve as well as our birthday boy, suggesting an astonishing density of famous Williams. There's also a plaque for Mark Ashton from action group Lesbians and Gays Support the Miners, as seen in the film Pride, who met in a room above the Gay's The Word bookshop. That's still trading at number 66 across the street, plus the pedestrian crossings up the street are painted in trans-friendly blue and pink, so it's likely a queer child growing up in a flat here today would feel a lot more welcomed by their inclusive environment.
1937: Kenneth's secondary education took place at Lyulph Stanley Central School in Camden, just round the corner from Mornington Crescent station. It looks very similar to Manchester Street, a tall brick warren with separate entrances for boys and girls. It's since become a primary school and been renamed Richard Cobden instead.
1939-ish: Kenneth's father took him out of school early to learn a trade, specifically as a mapmaker's draftsman at Stanfords in Covent Garden. The Blitz then intervened, triggering an evacuation to Bicester where Kenneth was billeted with a retired vet at 19 Sheep Street. We probably have Mr Chisholm to thank for KW's grasp of high culture, and perhaps for the fact he started a long-running diary in 1942. Kenneth turned 18 in 1944, joined the army and became a sapper in the Royal Engineers out East, transferring to the Combined Services Entertainment Unit after the war ended. But he still returned to Long Acre afterwards to continue his lithographic apprenticeship, at least until the lure of acting and showbiz drew him away for good.
These days the map shop is occupied by Lush dispensing bath bombs and other smellies, Stanfords having correctly deduced in 2018 that cartographic digitalisation was best confronted in a downsized store just round the corner.
1956: A regular part in Hancock's Half Hour finally raised enough cash for 30 year-old Kenneth to be able to move into his own flat. He paid £800 and on 25th March moved into 817 Endsleigh Court on Upper Woburn Place, again one street back from the Euston Road. While here he played the part of Private James Bailey in the very first Carry On film and also switched his radio allegiance to Beyond Our Ken. His house moves then come thick and fast. [map]
1959: Queen Alexandra Mansions, Hastings Street, King's Cross WC1 1960: 76 Park West, Kendal Street, Edgware Road W2 1963: 62 Farley Court, Allsop Place, Marylebone NW1 1970: Queen Alexandra Mansions, Hastings Street, King's Cross WC1 again
Kenneth Williams' officialblue plaque is at Farley Court, a mansion block on the east side of the housing conglomerate surrounding Baker Street station. He loved the view from the 9th floor, writing in his diary ‘My bedroom looks out over Regent's Park. The trees are turning now and the sight is beautiful. I can see all the traffic twinkling down the Marylebone Rd. It's all so marvellous, I could cry.’ But there was a downside in the street immediately below, specifically ‘the nits crowding round outside the waxworks. How I loathe them and Madame Tussaud’.
Those nits are still there, both the end of the queue snaking round the building for admittance and the tourists pouring out of what used to be the Planetarium having spent a fortune in the shop. They linger on the pavement, shelter in Farley Court's lobby and generally get in the way of things, unsure which iconic attraction to visit next. The traffic noise remains bad and this soon niggled the ever-crabby Kenneth Williams. But it was the increasingly unaffordable rent that eventually drove him out, that and the opportunity to grab a flat immediately opposite his elderlymother, who despite not being in the best of health would ultimately outlive him.
1972: Kenneth's last move was to yet another mansion block, this time at 8 Marlborough House on Osnaburgh Street, two minutes north of Great Portland Street station. A friend once described it as 'punishingly spartan', as if living here were more a trial to be endured than a reward for a successful life. A multitude of media appearances followed, each an opportunity to pay the rent and to bask in brief adulation, and whenever he recorded Just A Minute he loved to say that he'd "come all the way from Great Portland Street". But health issues dragged him down, notably an inflamed stomach ulcer, and his diaries record progressive unhappiness. On 15th May 1988 Kenneth Williams was found dead in his apartment following an overdose of barbiturates, the coroner ultimately unable to decide if it was accidental or suicide, and alas at the age of just 62 the talented, waspish boy from King's Cross was taken from us.
Kenneth Williams' final flat no longer stands, having been demolished in 2007 to make way for the Regent's Place development. This shiny glass 'innovation campus' beside the Euston Road is about as unKenneth as you can get, all forward-looking and mirthless, so don't waste your time coming here if you want to celebrate his 100th birthday today.
Better ways to celebrate include:
• Several programmes have appeared on the iPlayer including a 90 minute documentary, his star-packed Wogan stand-in, a collection of Parkinsons, a 1975 tour of Bloomsbury, and that Comic Roots I mentioned.
• Six hours of archive programming are being broadcast today on Radio 4 Extra. Six hours! There are 23 segments altogether, from Desert Island Discs to Round the Horne, plus several short interviews with superfan Wes Butters. From 6am to noon they're all being broadcast separately, then repeated from noon til six and six til midnight in one mega-downloadable chunk.
• You may remember Wes Butters as the Radio 1 chart show's youngest ever DJ in 2003 aged 23. He's now obsessed by Williams, so much so so that he sneaked into Osnaburgh Street while it was being demolished, acquired all Williams private papers off his godson, has written a coffee table book and has made a biographical film premiered earlier this month at the Cinema Museum. Go Wes.
• I skipped over Kenneth's ongoing contribution to British television, but Ian Jones has just published a 12000-word analysis on his new blog so best read that.
• Or grab a copy of Kenneth Williams' agonisingly frank diaries, as edited by Russell Davies, for four decades of retrospection from before he was well known to after he thought he was worthless. We all know better, but alas it's too late for that.
St David's Day quiz
During February 2003 on diamond geezer I kept myself busy by counting things. Ten different counts, to be precise, in a none-too thrilling daily feature called The Count. My 28-day tally chart may have been deathly dull to the rest of you, but I've continued to count those categories again every single February since, purely to keep tabs on how my life is changing. Twenty-three years later I can confirm it's changed quite a lot and I have the data to prove it. Below are my counts for February 2026 accompanied by the previous statistics and some deep, meaningful pondering.
