Last summer I noted a musical disturbing phenomenon in the US Billboard Hot 100, namely the emerging dominance of double-headed artiste amalgamations. Gruff rappers and pouting R&B divas were joining together to grunt and wail in unlikely one-off pairs. Doubling-up was clogging up the charts. Well, it hasn't taken long for this grim phenomenon to cross the Atlantic. Take a look at this week's UK Top 10 singles, and quiver:
1) Timbaland featuring Nelly Furtado & Justin Timberlake 2) Mark Ronson featuring Daniel Merriweather 3) Avril Lavigne 4) Proclaimers featuring Brian Potter & Andy Pipkin 5) Beyonce & Shakira 6) Gwen Stefani featuring Akon 7) Fray 8) Fergie featuring Ludacris 9) Alex Gaudino featuring Crystal Waters 10) Kaiser Chiefs
Look, that's 70% of our top-selling songs recorded by two or more musical superstars (of varying importance) and just three singles by single artistes. Admittedly one of those seven is a Comic Relief special (where the 80s backing track is the real thing), but the rest are just shameless promotional pairings. So why might dubious duplication suddenly be so prevalent? Here are a few suggestions:
• pairing up artists sells more singles to both sets of fans • pairing up artists sells more ringtones to both sets of fans • pairing up artists encourages the fans of one to buy the latest album of the other • double the celebrity, double the publicity • today's artists don't have sufficient talent to make a record by themselves • today's youth will buy any old rubbish won't they? <shakes head in despair>
This isn't an entirely new phenomenon. Even 25 years ago the charts were being bothered by pairings such as Paul McCartney & Stevie Wonder and Bananarama with Funboy Three. But those weren't part of a cynical marketing onslaught, not like today's increasing record industry reliance on "X featuring Y" to shift uninspiring unoriginal product. Still, I guess I shouldn't complain. At least our current Top 10 is entirely X-Factor-free, so we can't have reached the nadir of musical achievement yet. Yet.
