There are seven distinct rollingstocks on the London Underground, ranging from fairly new to creakingly old. My challenge today is to ride all seven of them as quickly as possible.
For extra challenge, can I do it and return to where I started, and for extra challenge, can I ride the lines in a narratively satisfying order? Yes I can, near enough.
S Stock(introduced 2010-2017) District line: Embankment → Westminster About: This is the newest rolling stock on the Underground, unbelievably, given that it started entering service fifteen years ago. In good news for this challenge it runs on four different lines so once I've ridden the District line I have no need to ride the Circle, Hammersmith & City or Metropolitan. Yes technically the Metropolitan uses eight-carriage trains called S8 Stock and the others use seven-carriage stock called S7 (and the seats are a bit different) but fundamentally they're identical. The S either stands for 'suburban' or 'sub-surface', depending on which TfL document you read. I boarded: carriage 21344. The carriage: Bigger than all the other tube carriages because the sub-surface tunnel cross-section is wider. Yellow grabpoles, yellow dangly straps. A few flip-up seats as a sop to wheelchairs and luggage. Fluorescent tube lights behind a silver mesh. Fully walk-through. The moquette: A nice 'equals' pattern using the colours of the four lines. Noticeably worn on several of the seats. Floor: Light grey with yellow, green and black speckles. Peculiarities: A sign which illuminates to alert passengers that this door will not open (because sometimes it pays to have trains longer than your shortest platform). Buttons to open the door that you don't generally need to press. Lights at the foot of the door which go out when the train is ready to depart and you can't open the door any more. Mostly driven by computer. Fellow passengers: Loud grandparents up from Essex (though probably Hornchurch), he in West Ham jacket, she clutching granddaughter with blonde hair in obligatory ponytail. Sound: Multiple beeps as the doors close, satisfying clunk, rising whine like a Star Trek transporter bay... brakes on, doors whoosh open, four-note musical phrase (minor third descending, twice).
1996 Stock(introduced 1997-2000) Jubilee line: Westminster → Green Park About: Built in Birmingham and Barcelona. Started entering service 28 years ago. Had a 7th carriage added in the mid 2000s. Externally similar to trains on the Northern line. I boarded: carriage 96478. The carriage: Not big on numbers of seats. Includes bumrest area either side of the central doors. Grey grabpoles (used to be yellow, as you can see in my photo which is from 2013). Windows are not deep. The moquette: Blue 'Barman', the nice repeating pattern with the hidden London landmarks. Floor: Dark grey with speckles (not pictured). Peculiarities: Red-outlined buttons you don't need to press. Driven by computer since 2011. At several stations hidden on the platform behind a glass screen with numbered doors. Fellow passengers: Smartly dressed family still moaning that Sophie Ellis-Bextor wasn't the best choice for the BBC1 New Year singalong, musically speaking. Sound: This is the great one, the unique repeated howl as the train starts up, then the inverse repeating downward whine as it pulls into the platform. All something to do with the auxiliary converters and/or the GTO thyristors, apparently, but an unmistakable audio signature because no other tube train sounds anything like.
2009 Stock(introduced 2009-2012) Victoria line: Green Park → Oxford Circus About: The second-newest rolling stock on the Underground, which means I've now ridden all the 21st century trains. Made in Derby. I boarded: carriage 14031. The carriage: 4cm wider than the original trains they replaced. Feels more geometric than your average tube train. Blue grabpoles (but Piccadilly blue rather than Victoria). Tip-up seats and wheelchair spaces included as standard. The moquette: Wool and nylon, a light/dark blue patterned background with a white chevron and red square pattern. Floor: Light grey with blue speckles. Peculiarities: Has dazzling ice-blue headlamps that herald its arrival from far down the tunnel. No buttons on the doors (mainly because no platforms are outdoors). Picture flashes to show doors are about to close. Driven by computer since forever. Fellow passengers: Three beardy gents in outerwear suitable for winter hillwalking, plus polished brogues. Sound: Highest pitched of the motor noises, somewhere between a boiling kettle and a starship entering hyperdrive.
1992 Stock(introduced 1993-1995) Central line: Oxford Circus → Tottenham Court Road About: Note how rolling stock isn't always introduced in the year it's named after. Over 30 years old so starting to break down more frequently, not helped by the upgrade project running massively behind schedule. Various pixels missing from destination dot-matrix on front of train. Also used on the Waterloo & City line (formed of four carriages) which is useful because it means I don't have to ride that. I boarded: carriage 91315. The carriage: Red grabpoles. Some seats recessed to allow passengers to walk round grabpole. Two door buttons, green for Open and red for Close (again unused). Ventilation grilles (not passenger controlled). Tinted windows. The moquette: Barman again. Floor: Light grey with white speckles. Peculiarities: Won't move if someone's leaning on the doors. Remains of poppy still visible as scrappy outline on driver's cab. First rolling stock to implement digital voice announcements. Fellow passenger: Squat hipster with pink mohawk clutching skateboard. Sound: Long steady hissy build-up. Can make a right screeching racket mid-tunnel.
1995 Stock(introduced 1998-2000) Northern line: Tottenham Court Road → Leicester Square About: Introduced long after the year it's named after. Only six carriages, but still doesn't completely fit into some platforms. Similar to the 1996 stock on the Jubilee line but uses newer technology. I boarded: carriage 52602. The carriage: Blue grabpoles (used to be yellow). Buttons on doors covered over during refurb. Ventilation grilles (not passenger controlled). The moquette: Barman again. Floor: Light grey with blue speckles. Peculiarities: Exterior of train miserably grimy. Graffiti on door. Warning stickers on doors cracked with age. Seen better days, but not even on the drawing board to be replaced. Fellow passenger: Whoever it was left an empty Krispy Kreme packet on the seat beside me. Sound: 28 consecutive high-pitched beeps every time the doors are about to shut. Not as noisy as the near-identical 1996 Stock because the motors are more modern and use IGBTs rather than thyristors.
1973 Stock(introduced 1975-1978) Piccadilly line: Leicester Square → Piccadilly Circus About: Will be 50 years old in July, an anniversary TfL is unlikely to celebrate. Should have started to be replaced by now but the introduction of 2024 Stock is running repeatedly late. Second-oldest rolling stock still in public use in the UK. I boarded: carriage 361 (the numbers were a lot lower in those days). The carriage: Blue grabpoles, obviously. Includes luggage space as trains were introduced in readiness for Heathrow extension. Contains nowhere near enough luggage space the closer to the airport you get. The moquette: Light blue Barman (older version pictured). Floor: Light grey with blue speckles. Peculiarities: Ventilation grilles with red handles, labelled Open and Close. Vertical maps beside door. Namechecks manufacturers Metro-Cammell in the floor by the doors and renovators Bombardier at the end of the carriage. Fellow passengers: Airport-bound tourists who unluckily picked a grey chilly week in London. Sound: Relatively undistinctive.
1972 Stock(introduced 1972-1975) Bakerloo line: Piccadilly Circus → Charing Cross About: Based on the 1967 Stock on the Victoria line. Started out on the Northern line but moved to the Bakerloo when the 1995 Stock was introduced. Now 53 years old and the oldest rolling stock in regular passenger service in the United Kingdom. Almost like riding a heritage train. Pencilled in to be replaced after the new Piccadilly rolling stock's been introduced but as yet unfunded so almost certain to reach its 60th birthday. I boarded: carriage 4367. The carriage: Seen better days. Tube map at end of the carriage eroded and unreadable. 'Seabase' scrawled in the dirt on the exterior and 'DIGS' scrawled under the door. Graffiti tags on surfaces inside the carriage. Scratched windows. Brown grabpoles, obviously. The moquette: Barman again, but brown. Floor: Brown with light speckles. They might have overdone the brown overall. Peculiarities: Some of the last forward-facing seats on the Underground. Proper cushions. Dinky little sausage-shaped seat dividers (not arm rests). Fake leather used above longitudinal seats. Proper large windows. Round vents like tea strainers. Ventilation toggle labelled Open Closed and Open. Flying-saucer shaped vents in the ceiling. Character. Fellow passenger: That's not somewhere I'd have put a piercing, it must make eating harder. Sound: The doors close with an irregular series of loud clunks. The train moves off with a constant wheeze and a sequence of analogue rattles from somewhere below. Occasional squeaks. Unmistakeably old school. Conclusion: A ride on the Bakerloo line should be a grim experience but I actually rather like it, the old trains have an real authenticity, and maybe I only think that because I don't ride them regularly or at peak times but I shall miss them when they're gone... which isn't looking likely any time soon.
I didn't quite end up where I started but Embankment and Charing Cross are about as close as two tube stations can be (and yes, I could have stayed on one more stop). It took 32 minutes overall, of which only 10 minutes was spent travelling. Started with the new trains, ended with the old trains, and my word you could see the degradation in rolling stock as the journey progressed. The resilience of the Underground network is not what it could be.
