Minutes of the TfL Brand Partnership Committee January 2026
Chair: I hear you've clinched a new tube line sponsorship deal, Magda. Do spill. Magda: Yes we're super-pleased with this one, it's a European brewery and they want to sponsor the Bakerloo line. Secretary: What?! The creaky line with the graffitied carriages and Britain's oldest passenger trains? Magda: That's the one. I told you we were chuffed. Chair: So what's the branding? What's the cunning creative idea? Magda: It's double zero.
Secretary: Wow, that is so clever... actually no, I don't get it. Magda: Oh sillychops don't you ever go out to bars these days? It's a beer darling. Chair: I'm not sure we should be promoting beer in such a cavalier fashion, even for lots of money. Magda: Oh heavens it's not a proper beer, it's non-alcoholic. Nobody's going to get even slightly tipsy from this. Secretary: People actually pay to drink beer with no alcohol in? Magda: Of course! Nobody wants to be Nobby-No-Mates ordering orange juice! Far cooler to buy to be seen drinking the right brand without any of the squiffy after-effects. Chair: Oh and it's January so everyone's on a teetotal health kick at the moment! Magda you are brilliant.
Magda: What we've done, obviously, is taken the brand's zero-point-zero moniker and incorporated it into the line name. Secretary: Presumably they'd have paid less if we'd offered them Waterl0.0 & City? Magda: Quite, plus bankers are really only interested in spread-betting and crypto, not piss-weak lager. Chair: I see you've branded some stations too.
Magda: Of course! Everyone loves it when we rename stations! Secretary: They don't actually. Remember the Burberry Street fiasco? That set back the cause of station sponsorship by decades. Magda: But we've been clever here. Waterl0.0 is essentially exactly the same as Waterloo. Not even an international tourist would be confused. Creativity always finds a way! Minion: But how does Oxf0.0rd Circus work? There aren't two consecutive o's, only one, that's incredibly contrived. Magda: We loved it, the client loved it! Who cares if if makes no practical sense, it's all about the social buzz!
Secretary: Just the two stations though? You didn't add Harr0.0w & Wealdstone, Kent0.0n or N0.0rth Wembley. Magda: Oh gosh no, why waste money on cash-strapped Londoners beyond zone 3! Chair: Please say you haven't replaced all the signs along the entire Bakerloo line. Secretary: Heavens no, we only ran amok at eight central stations. You only need a small presence to amplify the brand message, no need to spaff the cash more than strictly necessary. Chair: I hope there are modified roundels.
Magda: It wouldn't be a viral campaign without modified roundels! Just half a dozen at each affected station... no need to go over the top. Secretary: What the hell does 'Proud partner of Bakerl0.0' mean? Magda: It's just brandspeak darling. It means we're chuffed they've given us hundreds of thousands of pounds for a few temporary vinyls, and what marketing executive wouldn't be proud of that? Chair: I imagine the platforms at Waterl0.0 look quite something.
Magda: We're particularly proud of Waterl0.0. It pushes the creative envelope about as far as possible before some killjoy complains. Secretary: They may have a point. Isn't this just tacky money-grubbing desperation dressed up as creativity? Magda: I don't understand why anyone moans about our bold tube sponsorship deals. After all it helps keep fares down! Secretary: It very much doesn't, they're still going up 5.8% in March. Magda: Where's the harm? They're absolutely loving it on TikTok.
Minion: You do realise that map's wrong, don't you? Magda: Sorry what? This campaign has been creatively polished to perfection. Minion: But there's an error on the line diagram. Magda: No there can't be, all the marketing supremos checked it. Minion: An actual mistake which someone might have noticed if they had a basic knowledge of public transport rather than brand strategy. Magda: I'm not seeing it. Minion: You've got Kilburn Park and Maida Vale round the wrong way. Chair: Oh god that's seriously embarrassing. Minion: It should be Warwick Avenue... Maida Vale... Kilburn Park... Queen's Park. Magda: We'll leave it. After all, all publicity is good publicity!
Secretary: It worries me that schmoozing brands takes priority over accurate passenger information these days. Magda: Oh come on, accurate passenger information has been well down the TfL agenda for yonks. Think of the money! Chair: I vote we open a bottle of non-alcoholic beer in celebration. Cheers!
