✉ Peel On the western coast of the island sits Peel, a characterful town, or perhaps even city. It houses the only cathedral on the island, hub of the Diocese of Sodor and Man, which might have looked more impressive at the weekend had it not been raining and half-covered in scaffolding. The building is a Victorian replacement for the 13th century ruins on the most atmospheric spot hereabouts - St Patrick's Isle. As a proper island, just far enough offshore to be both accessible and defensible, it was the obvious spot for a Viking fort. This slowly grew into Peel Castle, essentially a whopping stone wall around the perimeter of the island with a motley collection of towers and garrisonry inside. An artificial causeway later linked the Isle to the harbour, making modern-day penetration of the fortifications considerably easier. For a fee you can walk freely within, clutching an audio guide to your ear and typing in numbers to learn more. The commentary is narrated by a fruity actor, and listening to the architectural detail for too long merely confirms that very little of historical note actually happened here. Peer over the curtain wall for a panoramic view, and be sure to seek out the steps down into the crypt beneath the ruined chancel where now only noisy seagulls congregate.
Peel's other main tourist attraction is the House of Manannan, a much more modern interpretation of the island's Celtic and maritime backstory. "We're closing in an hour and a half," said the lady at the ticket desk, "and normally we recommend at least two." She wasn't wrong. A series of multimedia and audiovisual experiences follow, winding around a large building, part of which used to be Peel station. Your guide is the mythical god Manannan, spirit of the sea, who has a tendency for excitable overacting and could easily be related to Captain Birdseye. "Follow me," he cried, popping up on animated screens in a Celtic roundhouse, a Viking longhouse and a field of stone crosses. The largest room is filled by the Odin's Raven, a recreated longship that sailed from Norway to Man in 1979, while another gallery celebrates The Isle of Man Steam Packet Company, the oldest continuously operating passenger shipping company in the world. Don't wander through too fast, you'll miss the point, which is to pause and interact and learn. And OK, so I ended up giggling every time Manannan popped up, but he fell away as the history became more recent, and the overall experience was highly atmospheric*. * and free, to those of us with National Trust membership - The Manx National Heritage Trust runs a reciprocal scheme that saved me over £20 across the weekend.
Across town is a warren of back-harbour streets, boasting all the quaint shops that Castletown and Ramsey lack. One of these is the Peel Ink Tattoo Studio - surely a highly inadvisable name for a commercial enterprise (although I searched in vain for a potential counterpart, the Peel Sunbed Centre). Down by the marina is the red and white home of Moore's Manx Kippers, a Victorian smokery still going strong and offering Escorted Kipper Yard Tours a couple of days a week if you time your visit right. Instead I arrived on "Secret Gardens" weekend, which meant the alleys in the town centre were thronging with middle-aged couples clutching brochures and attempting to cross off as many horticultural hideaways as they could. There's culture here, of many a kind, in a most (and you'll have been expecting this) a-peel-ing town. [9 photos][map]
✉ St John's
Had I arrived on the island a few days earlier I could have experienced the joys of Tynwald Day. This is a Manx bank holiday held in the first week of July which celebrates the founding of the world's longest surviving parliament, and is crowned off by an open air sitting on Tynwald Hill. Don't think mountain, think artificialmound comprising four concentric discs of earth containing soil from all corners of the island. Oaths are taken, laws are proclaimed, and then a fair breaks out on the surrounding lawn. Alas, arriving at the end of Manx National Week all I saw were lots of flags by some roadworks. [map]
✉ Spooyt Vane "No really, it's up here," I told BestMate as he manoeuvred our hire car up a narrow lane off a narrow lane. I'd been expecting a sign on the main road, given that Spooyt Vane was supposedly one of the island's highest waterfalls, but there was nothing, not even a sign on the footpath after we'd successfully parked. A five minute trudge revealed little, until a slight stream trickled gently, and nigh horizontally, beneath a thin stone bridge. "Have faith," I said, "the Ordnance Survey says it's here." And so it was, through a wooded glen and down umpteen steps into a leafy hollow. A volley of white water descended through a notch in the rocks, then tumbled again down a broad tongue of sandstone into a deep pool below. It had rained a lot the day before so we were more fortunate than some, indeed sometimes the gully is so dry that bikers chance their arm riding the approach. But there are post-storm days when the entire 50m descent is gushing with spray, and we didn't get that... just an imposing feeling of naturalsolitude in a secret spot most non-locals never find. [2 photos][map]
✉ Niarbyl
Off the coast road to the south of Peel, amid one of the remoter stretches of coastline, is a headland called Niarbyl. Its name means 'tail' in Manx, which is a good description of the low spine of rocks stretching out into the Irish Sea. Look down from the cafe's back garden and you might spot basking sharks and dolphins lurking in the bay... I only saw seals, but that was pretty good in itself. Head down to beach level and there are two thatched cottages, picture-postcard friendly, but the finest panoramic views from Peel round to Calf of Man are to be had from higher up. [2 photos][map]
✉ Calf of Man
And finally, right down at the southernmost tip of the Isle of Man, is a sizeable islet called the Calf of Man. It doubles up as a bird sanctuary, indeed you can get across if time and tide are right, but more likely you'll have to stare across from the mainland. Some of those rocky things are actually seals, if you stare carefully, but be warned that some of the seal-like things are actually rocks. For a protracted stare step inside the squat slate-topped circular building which looks like a Bond lair but is actually the Sound Café. During the day drinks and light refreshments are in order, but on summer evenings, assuming you can drive here, an a la carte menu is served. The premier seats are in a curve along the window, from which you can watch the sun set across the Irish Sea... or at least that would be the plan. A few minutes before BestMate and I turned up a sheet of cloud crept across from Ireland and obscured the entire spectacle, bar a few tantalising streaks of pink through the relentless grey, which was most frustrating. Instead we concentrated on our steak and chips, and the birthday party erupting on the long table behind us, and on the slowly rising tide around a darkening isle. As the other diners drifted away, eventually the only obstacle to an unobstructed view of the Calf was our own hire car, a true scenic own goal if ever there was one. But we still drove away from a highly memorable meal in full daylight - the sun sets at nearly ten during a Manx summer. I suspect we'll be back. [3 photos][map]
✉ Manx Electric Railway Los Angeles may have its Hollywood sign, but Douglas has the Electric Railway. Fifteen illuminated letters beam out across the bay, welcoming passengers to the far end of the promenade for a heritage ride. The Manx Electric Railway runs up the eastern side of the island from Douglas to Ramsey, with its main intermediate station at Laxey roughly halfway. It doesn't run direct either, following a sinuous 17 mile route along the coast, around headlands and across the tops of steep wooded valleys. Local residents could use it - there are innumerable request stops - but generally don't, it's far quicker to drive or take the bus. But the MER is ideal for tourists who want to take it slow and enjoy the view, plus there's an interchange at Laxey for those taking the train up the mountain. Just avoid the rush hour if you want to get a seat.
The first train of the morning looked to have plenty of space, but the luxury coach pulled up alongside should have been a warning. An entire walking party duly poured into the observation trailer from the platform side, squishing in with rucksacks and poles, creating a situation reminiscent of peaktime on the Northern line. And then we rattled off up the hill, past the bungalows and apartments on the edge of town, a hooter buzzing for every sideroad and farm track we crossed. The railway's twin tracks and electricity poles closely follow the main road, occasionally crossing it, before eventually careering off alone through clifftop fields. The first important stop is at Groudle Glen, the original 1890s terminus, where you can alight for yet another heritage railway, or a pootle down to the ruins of a Victorian pleasure garden. The walking party alighted at Fairy Cottage, which I was disappointed to see was a corrugated iron shelter, and then everybody else on board departed at Laxey. Which left BestMate and I with the entire service to ourselves, soaring over crystal blue bays and past goat-infested fields, to a tiny request stop at the top of a waterfalledglen. A proper treat and, if you avoid the busy stretch at a busy time, about as far away from the Northern line as it's possible to get. [7 photos][map]
✉ Douglas
The capital of the Isle of Man spreads out along a broad curved bay on the southeast corner of the island. Arrive by ship, say aboard the Steampacket from Liverpool or Dublin, and you'll disembark in the shadow of the Sea Terminal. This 1960sconcrete creation resembles a raindrop splashing in a bowl of water, or maybe a gasring, and may be the most Modernist chunk of architecture on the island. It's under threat of demolition, naturally, as the Manx government recently launched plans to replace it with "a new landmark gateway to the island" incorporating cruise liner facilities and commercial opportunities. Cruise liners are a growth area for the town, with one anchored offshore on Sunday disgorging its holidaymakers by shuttle across the bay. They might have enjoyed a walk along the promenade, with its arc of grand hotels and fluttering Manx flags, or taken a ride on the Horse Tram (which is yet another of the island's heritage railways).
Douglas is as close to UK-ordinary as the island gets, with parks and schools and housing estates. The main shopping street has several well-known household names, although I was disappointed to see that TK Maxx hadn't rebranded with an 'n' instead of that first 'x' - surely an opportunity missed. Residents have to get their entertainment where they can, hence the Gaiety Theatre sometimes welcomes acts from the mainland (it's John Newman next month), but more likely puts on a Gala Concert or Abba tribute. Sir Norman Wisdom was a huge fan of the island and spent the last 30 years of his life here. A hotel bar on the seafront is named after him, and a bronze likeness sits on a bench outside the front window, cloth cap on head, should you fancy a photo. If you can stand his cheery demeanour, this 5 minute TV clip promoting his favourite island gives a pretty good overview of the place. [12 photos][map]
✉ Ronaldsway
The island's main airport is perched on a flat plain by the coast, so you're likely to fly in low across the waves before touching down. Ronaldsway's departure lounge was opened 20 years ago by Nigel Mansell, another motorsport-related resident, and there's a decent view from the windows of planes taking off if you can't stick watching Channel 5 movies on the big screen telly. That scary-looking dark tower opposite belongs to King William's College, the private school with the nigh impossible general knowledge quiz the Guardian prints every Christmas. [1 photo][map]
✉ Castletown
Before Douglas took the administrative crown, the island's capital was Castletown. And that was for several centuries, when the Isle of Man had its own line of royalty and an entirely separate history to the rest of the British Isles. The Kings of Mann had a castle built here to protect them against the Vikings, the Scots and the English, with the current structure dating back to at least the 12th century. Castle Rushen is one of the best preserved medieval castles in the world, what with a dynasty to support and few marauding armies ever getting this far. And as such it's therefore a fine place for a visit, indeed its completeness is likely to make crumbling ruins elsewhere seem almost ordinary. Taking the tour involves climbing a spiral staircase in stages to the roof, or indeed several roofs, and enjoying the view down over town, harbour and Co-Op. More effort has been made on the descent to depict how the Lords of Mann might have lived and entertained, with some finely decorated rooms and a steward who'll tell you all about 17th century banqueting in fine detail until you manage to thank him and walk away.
The Queen is now the Lord of Mann, but only infrequently pops over to exercise her rights. Across the road is the Old House of Keys, formerly one of the houses of the Manx Parliament which, as you may know, is the oldest continuous parliamentary body in the world. This rather understated building was its home in the 19th century, then became a bank, and is now an intriguingly democratic tourist attraction. Visitors are invited to vote on historic motions from the island's past, including the one which gave women suffrage in national elections earlier than any other country in the world. A couple of othermuseums on the seafront give tourists alternative options for infotainment (the world's oldest yacht, anyone?), although the town centre itself is a bit small, and I can see why those elected representatives relocated. [4 photos][map]
(If protracted non-London reportage is getting you down, rest assured that later in the week I'll be bringing you all the latest news from Sutton)
✉ Point of Ayre The northern coastline of the Isle of Man is a low sand-duney place, curving round to a shingly tip at Point of Ayre. This remote spot is the closest the island gets to the British mainland, just 16 miles from Dumfries and Galloway in Scotland, and is also the location of the island's oldest lighthouse. This was designed and built by Robert Louis Stevenson's grandfather almost 200 years ago, and the signal is doubled up by a shorter metal "winkie" on the beach. The adjacent twin foghorn is a dramatic feature, ideal for an album cover design I'd say, but was decommissioned in 2005 thanks to the march of technology. A proper get-away-from-it-all spot (but mind your step amongst the pebbles so as not to disturb the nesting arctic terns). [2 photos][map]
✉ Ramsey
The second largest town on the island is Ramsey, with a well-protectedharbour and a lacklustre seafront overlooked by ill-advised apartments. The main shopping street runs from an independent ironmongers to a proper family drapery called Looneys via an actual Costa Coffee (their caffeinated tentacles get everywhere). It didn't seem the sort of place to stop for long... [3 photos][map]
✉ Maughold
...whereas this village, on a sticky-out headland to the east, was charming. A group of cottages hugs a crossroads by an ancient church, in whose graveyard are some of the oldest Celtic crosses on the island. To find the lighthouse head out the back gate and up the lane, and there it is at the foot of the cliffs. More impressive is the view inland across the Sheading of Garff, which ought to be a Game of Thrones dominion, with rolling fields rising towards not-so distant mountains. Sunday was Maughold's Parish Day, reluctantly postponed from a very rainy Saturday. Villagers were massing on the festooned field above the car park, while a bank of wooden chairs had been lined up on the tiny village green ready for the crowning of the Parish Queen, her throne a couple of rugs and some triskelion banners draped over a low stone memorial. [5 photos][map]
✉ Laxey
The one Manx tourist attraction everybody knows is the LaxeyWheel, which is the world's largest working waterwheel, and proper massive. Its size is due to a geological quirk - there is no coal on the Isle of Man, so when Victorian technology on the mainland turned to steam the locals here were forced to maximise their water power instead. The wheel's 72 feet high, six feet wide, and has three feet on the front (this a whopping great triskelion visible far down the valley). Water from the stream below is forced up the tower under pressure and dribbles over into the slatted buckets on the circumference causing the wheel to spin at three revs per minute. Motion is transferred to a lateral crank which pushes an incredibly long rod back and forth. This sits on casters along what looks likea Roman aqueduct, but was in fact a means of powering the drainage pumps in the zinc mine 400 yards up the valley. The Great Laxey Mine was once the richest metal mine in the British Isles and employed 600 men, with their wives doing more menial washing work lower down in the town.
As well as being desperately photogenic, the wheel's other attraction is the opportunity to ascend. A first climb takes you above the dripping base for a close-up of that three-legged logo, then a second brings you to axle level. Only Manx National Heritage Trust staff can step across the barriers to check the mechanics, and some fairly hefty restoration work is planned before next spring which should keep them busy. As for the next set of steps, spiralling around the outside of the water tower, I tried to force myself to climb them but a wobbly bit at the back of my brain said no. "Come on, you're only here once," I told myself, but when the prize for ascent was to stand on an exposed wooden platform with the wheel whirling beneath, I jellied out. Sheepishly I waited for BestMate to pop up and pop down, but even he returned with vertigo on his mind, so I felt less bad about missing out. Instead there were the old mineworkings at the top of the glen to investigate, these eventually higher than the top of the wheel had been, but at least on solid ground. Much to see, and rightly a tourist treat. [9 photos][map]
✉ Snaefell Mountain Railway Forget hiking, the most popular way to reach the top of the Isle of Man's highest mountain is by train. The Snaefell Mountain Railway starts from Laxey station and wiggles its way up to the summit along ratcheted rails. Best pick a decent day for it, else you'll get to the top and see nothing but the cafe. The service is run using six wooden-bodied electricrailcars, five of which are the originals from 1895 and were built in Birkenhead. Take a window seat if you can - the right-hand side's better for the first half up the valley, and the left-hand side's better for the spiral round the mountaintop. Some of the windows slide open, which is more useful on some days than others, but don't lean out else your camera, arm or head might be thwacked by one of the central posts supporting the overhead wires. Halfway up the five mile ascent the tracks cross the TT Course at Bungalow station, watched over by a giant goat, then continue up ever more exposed slopes to reach the top.
Trains pull up outside the Summit Hotel, 2096 feet up, with the option of exploring the proper peak or hiding inside where it smells of chips. Best I think to climb the ramp to the triangulation point, from which an almost 360° panorama can be seen, blocked only by two whopping mobile phone masts. A mixture of lesser mountains, glens and coastal plain should be visible, and on a really good day all the home nations on the horizon. And then the railcar will take you back down in half an hour flat, making this mountaineering for the lazy, but none the less exhilarating for that. [11 photos][map]
• The Isle of Man is one of those exotic bits of the British Isles where lots of people live, but that most others never visit.
• Getting there requires a boat or a flight (the latter about an hour from London), which can be expensive.
• Administratively and financially it's quite like Guernsey and Jersey - a Crown Dependency - and has a similar population (although the climate's not so good).
• Geographically, the north of the island is very flat, while a hilly mountainous swathe runs across the centre before falling away to a coastal plain to the south, where the airport is. • The island's emblem is the triskelion - three armoured legs with golden spurs. It's everywhere - on buildings, on banknotes, and flapping on banners and flags in several gardens - which gives a unified sense of national pride across the island.
• The Isle of Man is famed for the TT races that take place annually around the end of May. A 37 mile circuit of roads is appropriated for competitive use, and motorcyclists career round at speed trying not to crash into bends, stone walls, spectators and each other. The circuit is marked by black and white kerb tiles, by empty scaffolding located around the route (used for camera positions and spectator seating) and by thick crashbags tied to walls to protect life and property. It's an astonishing course, in part for the mundane way it passes through villages and built up areas, but also for the moorland stretch that rises up along a vertiginous ridge to cross a mountain pass. The views on the ascent can be spectacular, although in low cloud and mist must be considerably less so. Various points, including the highest part of the course, have high footbridges solely for use by spectators and local residents while the racing is taking place. Having (been) driven around the entire course, I am amazed that any bike can complete the circuit in under 20 minutes.
• The island is just over 30 miles from tip to tail, and about half that from side to side, so there's a lot of land to explore, but getting around by car is really quite manageable.
• Getting around by public transport is also fairly easy, with a comprehensive bus service and two heritage rail services along the east coast linking most of the main towns (except in the winter).
• Motorbikes and holidaying bikers are everywhere, not just throbbing around the TT course, and certain pubs overflow with late-middle-aged blokes in bike leathers at the end of the day. • The Isle of Man is very much a wheeled-traveller's island, not just for the racing but because of the network of twisty car-commercial-friendly roads. Listening to the local radio news at the weekend, the whole of one bulletin was devoted to car racing, bike racing and damaged mountain bikes. It's no surprise to discover that Jeremy Clarkson has a house here, presumably with a very large garage.
• Roads are numbered in a familiar way, from the A1 upwards, although the A2 gets a bit hairy in places, and by the time you reach the A10 you might want to slow down a bit. Only a couple of hundred yards of dual carriageway exist, immediately outside the airport.
• Car numberplates all contain the letters MN or MAN. A lot of people have hung onto prized plates that are solely MAN and a number.
• The Isle of Man is also very much a Daily Mail island - there are huge piles in every newsagent, to be read in conservatories, retirement apartments and on patios in trim detached gardens.
• Seafood is a speciality, not least the Manx kipper (I had them for breakfast two days running). Another local delicacy are Queenies - small sustainably-fished scallops - a bowl of which (with bacon and sauce) unexpectedly proved my favourite dish of the weekend.
• If you like walking, a network of well signed footpaths covers the island, and encircles it along the 90 mile coastalpath.
• They use our coins but have their own banknotes, which you're likely to get back in change (and which aren't legal tender over here).
• Contrary to expectations the IoM isn't all full of tax exiles, with about half of the population having been born here, and just as long a queue at the Iceland supermarket as you'd find on the mainland.
• The island has its own internet domain (.im), which is begging for creative use.
• There is a surprising amount to see and do on the island, so much that I could easily go back for another long weekend to fill in the gaps.
• And no, you don't need a passport to get here.
Isle of Man quiz
Before I drone on about where I went at the weekend, have a go at this short quiz to see how well you know the island. Select the correct option from the drop-down menu, then check your answers in the comments box.
1) The Isle of Man is in the . 2) The nearest country is . 3) It a member of the United Kingdom. 4) It a member of the European Union. 5) Its population is about . 6) Its area is about that of Greater London. 7) The capital is called . 8) The highest mountain is called . 9) The national speed limit is . 10) The top rate of income tax rate is .