diamond geezer

 Thursday, January 02, 2003

More Tales of the City

If you're going to San Francisco
be sure to...

... wear some flowers in your hair.
... grow a beard.
... take your photo ID - you're not allowed to enjoy yourself without one.
... wear a jacket at night - it almost always gets chilly.
... be in good shape if you're walking up any of the hills - the views are literally breathtaking.
... catch the stunning Pacific sunset.
... head over to Alcatraz and stand in the maximum security cell.
... grow an extra stomach - for digestion purposes, you understand.
... avoid drinking eggnog - which should be easy if you stay away during the holiday season.
... ignore the homeless sitting on every street corner.
... use your numeracy skills to add 15% service tips to all restaurant bills.
... expect the constellations to look a bit different, like all at the wrong angle.
... avoid chatting to the friendly people near Fisherman's Wharf - 15 seconds later they'll be trying to sell you something.
... gasp at the average age of all the TV presenters - at least 60.
... get your cholesterol checked on your return home - all breakfasts feature eggs.
... stop dead on a red light - nobody ever drives past one.
... avoid thinking "If there were to be an earthquake right now, I'd be crushed to death by that freeway above me."
... have an excellent time.

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