Wednesday, September 14, 2005
Free eye test
| Long-sightedness test | | Near-sightedness test |
| Instructions: Squint your eyes up close to the screen. How many lines down the chart can you read? | | Instructions: Go stand on the other side of the room. How many lines down the chart can you read? |
0 lines: You must be blind. | |
0 lines: Try standing in a smaller room. |
| 1 line: You must be either blind or dyslexic. | | 1 line: Even bats and moles are less short-sighted than you. |
| 2 lines: You can't even read this comment, can you? You twat. | | 2 lines: You don't need a pair of glasses, you need a telescope. |
| 3 lines: Time to downgrade to the largeprint novels at your local library. | | 3 lines: Admit it - you're living in a blur. |
| 4 lines: Maybe I could sell you a cheap pair of reading glasses? Only £30. | | 4 lines: Your driving is a danger to other road users. |
| 5 lines: You have perfectly normal reading vision. | | 5 lines: You have perfectly normal distance vision. |
| 6 lines: You could even read the smallprint at the bottom of a mobile phone contract. | | 6 lines: Sign up for the RAF today. Britain needs more pilots. |
| 7 lines: You're too close to the screen and have probably burnt out your retina. | | 7 lines: You are an owl. |
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