diamond geezer

 Sunday, May 20, 2012

If London is to survive into the 21st century as a global business hub, then greater airport capacity is undoubtedly required. But where? A third runway at Heathrow would be hugely controversial, requiring the demolition of a Middlesex village and an increased aircraft noise across West London. The government has confirmed that they would never give consent. A new airport in the Thames Estuary would be an environmental catastrophe, requiring the desecration of important natural resources. The people of Kent would never tolerate such an intrusion. But there is another way, a simpler solution, the perfect compromise. We must build Plaistow International Airport. You know it makes sense.

10 reasons why London must build Plaistow Airport

1) A new Plaistow Airport would recognise the increasing importance of East London, and would provide ease of international access to Canary Wharf, the Royal Docks and the post-Olympic Park.
2) The airport could be the size of Heathrow without causing any significant environmental damage beyond the boundaries of the London borough of Newham.
3) It's only Plaistow. Nobody will care if we demolish it.
4) West London has suffered enough from aircraft noise. It's only fair that the eastern side of the capital now takes its fair share of relentless jet droning. Let's bring peace to Brentford, even if that means double-glazed misery for Bow.
5) The proposed airport has excellent transport links, with both the DLR and the Jubilee line running along the perimeter of the site. Drivers would have easy access to the new airport via the A13. The District line already runs right through the heart of the site, with two existing stations that could be redeveloped underground as Plaistow Airport Central and Plaistow Terminal 2.
6) Plaistow Airport would be 15 miles closer than Heathrow to our main European trading partners, saving millions of hours of excess flying time each year.
7) The only economic asset of any importance in the designated demolition zone is West Ham United football club, and they'll be moving to the Olympic Stadium soon anyway.
8) There are already too many benefit scroungers living in the Plaistow/East Ham area. As part of the government's plan to remove such parasites, tens of thousands could be forcibly relocated to purpose built estates in the Home Counties, for example on the Isle of Grain.
9) Heathrow and Plaistow are very similar words, which might help to cement a new airport brand identity in the minds of potential foreign travellers. BAA must grasp the opportunity to upgrade the area's pronunciation from the frankly common "Plah-stow" to the much more desirable "Play-stow".
10) It would be ghastly if London's powerbrokers weren't able to fly abroad fifteen times a year for business meetings and skiing holidays. Let's sacrifice Plaistow now, for the benefit of the Londoners who truly matter.

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