• Shopping would always be madness.
• No more Countdown on C4, just endless reruns of The Snowman.
• You'd forever be wrapping presents but not opening them.
• You'd soon run out of sellotape.
• Christmas jumpers would no longer be a novelty.
• It'd always be early closing day.
• You'd leave a mince pie out for Santa but he'd never come.
• Midnight Mass would suddenly end at midnight.
I wish it could be Christmas every day
• Wham would be at number 1 forever.
• Cases of alcoholism would soar.
• You'd never have to go back to the office.
• Sunset would always be before 4pm.
• You'd soon discover 4000 calories a day is not a sustainable lifestyle.
• Politics would cease.
• Vernon Kay would never have to pretend Ten To The Top was fun - instead it'd always be Anneka Rice playing Puff The Magic Dragon.
• A dog is just for Christmas.
• You'd be permanently stuffed and drunk.
• I'd spend my life in Norfolk.
• There'd always be giblets.
• The King's Speech would get increasingly poor viewing figures.
• No football, no Eurovision.
• A significant proportion of UK housing stock would be permanently empty.
• That bottle of sherry'd eventually get finished.
• There'd be no trains, ever, so car drivers would rule the roost.
• You'd never be able to get your hair cut.
• Pigs in blankets would stop being a special treat.
• At some point, eventually, it would be a white Christmas.
• All supermarkets would be permanently closed, which would make subsequent Christmas dinners very hard to source.
• Hang on, if the shops are shut and the Royal Mail and couriers are all off work how does anyone get any presents?
• Russell T Davies would have to write a heck of a lot of new Doctor Who episodes.
• Your local surgery's always closed so you'll likely die sooner.
• The newspaper industry would fold.
• Eventually we'd all be Capricorns.
• This blog would be all photos.
I wish it could be Boxing Day every day
• Mince pies would always be half price.
• The only TV adverts would be for holidays and sales.
• You'd never have Christmas to look forward to.
• Your life would be mostly inert.
• Life with the parents/in-laws/relatives would soon grate.
• Nobody'd ever see you in swimwear so you need never go to the gym.
• You'd end up throwing away the Monopoly set so it could never be played again.
• There still wouldn't be any trains, ever, so car drivers (and Londoners) would rule the roost.
• Local news would be mostly shopping and fox hunting-related.
• I'd spend a third of my life on my brother's camp bed.
I wish it could be December 27th every day
• You could spend every day on your sofa in your onesie watching boxsets.
• Tubs of Celebrations would only contain Bountys.
• A lifetime of eating leftover turkey.
• Creme Eggs would always be in season.
• An eternity of rail replacement buses.
I wish it could be Christmas Eve every day
