Journalists working at various media portals are under increasing pressure to churn out more and more stories because the more they write the more page views they get. Clickbait isn't going away any time soon. But a trope that's sadly gathering more prominence lately is a willingness to promote sponsored superlatives sent to them in a press release. Here's a sample headline from an article I won't be linking to.
It’s official: England’s best private school is in London
It's Westminster School, apparently. But if you read a bit further it says "the list is by Ivo Education, an education company focusing on tuition, and it ranks schools based not just on A-level results but GCSEs, too." In other words there's nothing official about this, it's just the way a marketing department has chosen to rank some data in the hope that their brand name will be prominently displayed. Reporters under pressure, alas, are often all too happy to oblige.
Here's a worse example.
London’s Most Haunted Borough Has Just Been Revealed – And It’s A Surprising One "The house insurance experts over at Alan Bogwell Group conducted a study to determine which borough is the most haunted. The research was based on paranormal encounter reports, the number of cemeteries and memorials, the amount of vacant properties, and how many houses built before 1918 are in each borough."
There's absolutely no reason why this combination of data should generate a definitive 'most haunted' borough, even if you reckon ghosts exist, and yet someone's crunched the numbers anyway and someone else has dutifully megaphoned this bolx to a wider audience. The top slot's taken by Kensington and Chelsea, if you were wondering.
Here are five more examples of the genre, all from the last month, all of which ridiculously claimed that London was the best at something. It may look like I'm including the name of the company whose tosh is being magnified, but I've changed one letter in every brand name so as not to enhance the SEO.
The world’s most ‘picturesque’ cities, ranked "Printfux, a print-on-demand platform, has conducted a study and crunched the numbers on which cities have garnered the most Instagram hashtags to create a ranking of the world’s most ‘picturesque’ cities. Claiming the top spot? It’s none other than London!"
London Has Been Named The Most Popular Christmas Destination In The World (According To Instagram) "Digital marketing agency Henmessy Digital are well-and-truly ready for Santa Claus to come to town, as they’ve just conducted an entire new study to find out where in the world is the most popular Christmas destination."
London Crowned The Best European City For Travelling On A Budget "The booking portal for holiday homes Holido have conducted a study that crowns London as the free attraction champion of Europe."
London Has Been Crowned The Best City In The World For An Autumn Escape "The travel gurus over at SkiParkSecure have crunched the numbers and found that the gorgeous brown leaves that cover the London parks at this time of year make it the place to be in the months of September – November."
London Has Been Crowned The Pizza Capital Of The UK – With 1,454 Hotspots To Choose From "The study was conducted by Gokney, a premium outdoor oven brand, who investigated the number of pizza joints in the most populated British cities, as well as the number of pizza places rated 4 stars or above, and the average yearly search volume for pizza-related terms."
The pizza one is particularly ridiculous. Whoever would have guessed that the location with the most pizza outlets would be the largest city in the UK? More to the point, which fool turned this obvious outcome into a news story?
Then there's the "something in London is officially excellent" sub-genre.
This London Airport Has Been Named As One Of The Most Instagrammable In The Whole World "Travel website Mrs Tourist have crunched the numbers to determine which airports are the ‘most instagrammable’ in the entire world, and an airport in London is right up there!"
(Heathrow is 3rd)
5 London universities are officially the best in the world for 2025 "Timez Higher Education has released its prestigious list of the best universities in the world for 2025. And it’s got us Londoners feeling pretty smug."
(Imperial College is 9th, UCL 22nd, King’s College 36th, LSE 50th and Queen Mary University 141st)
These Two London Trails Have Been Named Among The Most Scenic Running Routes In The Whole UK "Price-comparison site Ideado crunched the numbers in a new study. They gathered the number of TikTok and Instagram posts that used tags including #trailrunning to gather the most popular scenic running routes around the country."
(Epping Forest Main Path is 5th and the Thames Path 9th)
My very favourite ridiculous claim, from earlier this year, is that London was the 8th best UK city from which to see April's full moon.
"A recent study by Bókup, a travel booking management software provider, looked at the UK’s light pollution to find out which city would be the best place to see the moon in all its radiance. They also considered factors such as elevation (the closer you are, the better your view!), cloud cover, and visibility distance. According to this information, Coventry is the very best place to see the ‘Pink Moon’ in the UK. This is due to the second-best level of light pollution and a relatively high elevation compared to other cities."
Secret London merrily parroted this one, as of course did the Coventry Observer, without ever stopping to realise that the moon is visible from anywhere so nobody's going to travel to see it better. What they should really have done was check the weather forecast, not the light pollution, because that particular night in April was pretty much clouded out.
Another disappointing trend in recent output is the increasing misuse of the word 'soon'.
This iconic London stadium could soon get massively expanded
<click> it's the Emirates Stadium but "it’s very early days"
West London could soon get a massive new live music venue
<click> it's an empty site in Hammersmith without planning permission and "it could be up to a year before the plans become a reality"
Parliament Square could soon be completely pedestrianised
<click> the "bold plan" is "still in its ‘conceptual’ stage"
This abandoned London train line could soon be brought back to life
<click> it's the West London Orbital, and "services could start in the early 2030s"
The Elizabeth line could soon be extended to these two locations
<click> "We don’t know yet whether or when these line extensions will take place, but we’ll update you when we find out."
That's 'soon' meaning anything from 'many years away' to 'as yet unplanned' to 'nobody actually knows'. But seeing the word 'soon' makes everyone click and this delivers optimum shareholder value.
Rest assured all the typical clickbait is still there.
London train strikes October 2024: everything you need to know
<click> "No strikes have been officially called"
And finally, to save you a click, here's the latest festive teasing.
🎄 Oxford Street Have Announced The Dazzling Return Of Their Spectacular Christmas Lights <click> (November 5)
🎄 The switch-on date for Regent Street’s 2024 Christmas lights has been revealed <click> (November 7)
🎄 Here’s the exact date Carnaby Street’s Christmas lights will be turned on for 2024 <click> (November 7)
🎄 Here’s the exact date Covent Garden’s Christmas lights will be turned on for 2024 <click> (November 12)
🎄 Marylebone Village Has Just Announced When Its Dazzling Christmas Lights Will Be Switched On This Year <click> (November 13)
🎄 Leadenhall Market Has Already Announced The Switch-On Date For Its Gorgeous Christmas Lights For 2024 <click> (November 14)
